Page 80 of The Forbidden Fae King

I greedily scan Aldrin, as though the answer lays there. The sharp angles of his tanned face. The broad chest with unbound hair draping down it. Bulky, muscular thighs with large, callused hands hanging casually between them. I should be afraid of him, but I can’t pinpoint why.

My throat dries, and I swallow hard. “I didn’t plan to take the pilgrimage. I didn’t think I deserved it, that I had the right to an adventure for self-discovery. How could I risk myself, when the entire kingdom needs me?” The information is forced right out of my mouth. I should feel horror, perhaps there was a revelation in them, but I can’t mutter any emotion at all.

Caitlin’s sharp intake of air is a distant thing sliding over my senses. Aldrin’s expression as he raises his eyebrows and turns to Cyprien means nothing to me.

“I spent my life preparing for the day Prince Finan finally committed to marrying me, for when I was to become queen.” A shudder ripples through me. “I studied alone with my tutor. History. Battle tactics. Foreign politics. Diplomacy. Except no one in the royal family cared to hear my ideas. I devoted my life to him, but then discovered he would toss me aside if a better bride came along. He would take my own sister if the king demanded it. My carefully planned future crashed down around me.”

A tear rolls down my cheek, but I have no idea why. More spillsfrom my lips. “I chose the dangerous pilgrimage because meeting the fae and learning their culture had been my dream as a child. I came here to experience life, before becoming locked away in another castle. Before becoming bound to Prince Finan.”

I fall silent, panting at the exertion, and staring at nothing. A great void opens within me and I tumble within it, falling deeper and deeper into that despair.

The magic tugs at me, and I hear Aldrin as though he is very far away. “More. Tell me more. What is the pilgrimage?”

I hardly register the words that fall from me. “It is the greatest honor. Women who take it and return are celebrated. We become priestesses, and are offered a comfortable life in the temple if we want it. Upon taking up the call, women are schooled in all we know about this realm, but it is precious little. We are trained to defend ourselves, and then we are guided through the portal, like lambs to a slaughter. Our mission is to bring magic back to our lands, sometimes a relic or a heart-stone, sometimes a woman returns pregnant. Some never return at all.”

Anger ripples across Aldrin’s features and I can hear Caitlin telling them to stop what they are doing to me, that none of it is true.

I was supposed to hide any information that would betray my realm. How can a single woman hold back the tides of the ocean?

“Was that your intent?” Aldrin’s low rumble is filled with fury. “To return pregnant?”

“No.” My every muscle is limp and I wonder if I will fall out of this chair. “No. I came to look after Caitlin. To learn about the fae, not to gather information on an enemy, but to write an academic tome. To learn the magic of these lands and the language of the runes. We planned to make a bargain with a Lake Maiden and return home with the gift of her seed-stones, one in my pocket and one in Caitlin’s belly.

“Not all humans are so considerate. Some would steal and lie and kill in their desperation to return magic to our realm and save our way of life. Fae slip into my world to kidnap our women and turn them into breeding slaves. They take from us what they need, and wedo the same. It is not moral, but it is necessary to save thousands of human lives.”

“Is this celebration of the pilgrimage, of killing fae, celebrated universally in your realm?” Aldrin practically growls.

“Yes.” I half-choke, trying to keep the word in.

“How do you feel about this cruelty and prosecution of the fae by humans?” He probes.

“It is wrong. It weighs heavily on my conscience. I am powerless to it,” I say.

“How would the humans react to the portals opening permanently again? To the idea of an alliance and coexisting?” Aldrin’s voice is rough.

I glance around the room and find Cyprien holding Caitlin back from me while she kicks and claws at him.

“Fear. Mistrust,” I utter. “If the portals opened without prior agreement, they would be met with a human army.”

I try to focus on my breathing, in and out. On tensing each individual muscle, to bring myself back in control of my body, but the haze is so thick.

I want to clamp my lips down, but the words keep escaping. “The priestesses would have the power and influence to make an alliance. They reside in every province in the kingdom and are almost as powerful as the king. These women have traveled to these lands and they are an authority on the Otherworld and magic itself. If any could convince the lords of the benefits of connecting our realms, it would be them, but it would incite a bloody civil war. Prejudice is strong.”

I sway in my seat as my vision blurs in and out. “The lords could combine their forces to push the king into an alliance. But not the current king. Not King Willard. He is too old and hateful. But Prince Finan, the man I am to marry, I could convince him. The lords, the priestesses, and the druids could convince him. My grandmother is the high priestess, my brother a druid and my father the lord protector of the lands that border this realm.”

Aldrin leans into me, his face so close to mine. “If you became queen, would you push for an alliance between our lands?”

“If I am convinced your people would treat mine with respect and as equals, then yes, I would,” I say.

There is a long pause. I can almost see the gears turning within Aldrin’s mind as he looks away from me.

“Do you want to marry Prince Finan?” Aldrin speaks ever so gently.

“No. I do not.” My statement hangs between us. “What I want doesn’t matter. If I do not become his queen, if I do not control and guide him, his reign will be a disaster that will be felt across the kingdom.”

A series of expressions pass across Aldrin’s face and I can’t read a single one of them. “I have one last question for you.” He seems to hesitate, eyes utterly vulnerable. “Are you the second daughter of Edmund, Lord Protector of Appleshield?”

What a strange question for him to ask.

---