Page 4 of Shadow's Sinner

“You will not question your father!” Mom hisses, her eyes narrowing down at me.

“Yes, ma’am,” I mutter, swallowing the lump in my throat.

“It’s okay, dear.” Dad doesn’t bother looking up at his wife. “The church has agreed you’re the perfect fit for this…adventure.”

My spine stiffens as my body breaks out in goosebumps. The way he says adventure makes it sound like anything but fun, but I don’t question him again. Mom glares at me, daring me to do anything but agree.

“I look forward to it.” The words leave my mouth even though I’m not sure I should be looking forward to it.

“Then it’s settled. Tomorrow after school, you and the other five girls will head out on this camping trip,” Dad says, getting up from his chair. “It’s time for bed now.”

“Yes, sir,” I say mindlessly.

I stand from the chair and leave his office, closing the door behind me. Lilianna stands in her bedroom doorway, watching me, her brow raised. It appears she has no idea what they wanted to talk to me about, either. I can't help but find that odd as well. Lilianna and Mom are like two peas in a pod. I longed for that feeling, to know what it was like to have a caring parent. But I was always the outcast. Mom looked for reasons to yell at me and punish me. Dad didn’t pay attention to me until I did something he didn’t approve of, and I would be beaten for it.

I reach my room and close the door before I let out my first full breath since getting home earlier. My tiny room might not be much, just a twin bed in the corner with bright yellow bedding. A desk across from my bed has a small container of pens. Thedresser sits behind the door with my alarm clock on top. But it’s my safe space, the only place I can breathe freely.

I don’t bother with the light. Stripping out of my dress, I pull out my pajamas and get dressed. Slipping under the covers, I lay on my side, the window allowing just enough moonlight in. It doesn’t take long before my eyelids grow heavy, pulling me into a restless sleep.

Chapter Two

“Praise the king! Blessed be!” The melodic chants swirl through the thick, hazy air, wrapping around me like a comforting blanket. The cloaked figures surround us in the forest's darkness, pressing further towards us into the circle. My small hand reaches up to tug on my father’s sleeve as my eyes sweep the circle. Everyone’s faces are hidden inside of their black hoods. My father peers down at me with a small smile as he tugs me closer to the bed of hay in the middle of the circle.

“Son, what we are doing today is of utmost importance. We have a sinner in our midst. Someone we should have been able to trust, but they’ve deceived us. Can you be strong for me tonight and help lead the disciples to the path ofrighteousness?” my father asks. I’ve never heard my father’s voice like this, angry but sad. He turns me around to face the opposite side of the circle as he stands behind me with his hands on my shoulder. Holding me tightly in place.

The chants continue until they are so loud my ears start to hurt. I throw my hands up over my ears to ease the pain, but my father grabs them and forces them back down to my side, making me wince. The circle parts, and two cloaked figures drag in a sobbing woman. She has mud caked to her feet, crawling up her legs like vines. Her clothes are ripped in spots and plastered to her body with sweat and blood. Blood runs down her face in small rivulets. Her hair is matted to her head like it hasn’t been washed in weeks. The woman struggles to escape the cloaked figures, backpedaling as much as her small, frail body will allow her.

“Please, no. I swear I didn’t mean it! You can’t do this to me!” the woman screams, her voice clogged with tears. She looks up at me, and her eyes flash with recognition, causing her to sob even harder. “N-n-no, please, not in front of him! Colin, please, you can’t do this to me, to him!” She’s thrown down at our feet on the bed of hay, struggling to her knees and grabbing my hands with her filthy ones. “Atti, honey, please tell your father how good I’ve been.” My mother pleads for me to help her out of the hole she made for herself. She looks up at me with hurt swimming in her eyes as I drop her hands and take a step behind my father. Leaving her there to deal with the consequences. Her wails of sorrow reach my ears, and my stomach rolls with nausea.

“Martha, you knew what you were doing before you did it. You knew you were breaking our sacred vows. Thou shall not keep their children from their parents. Thou shall not sully their marriage bed with sexual sins.” The anger in my father’s voice makes me scared for my mother. I know that, in herway, she was trying to do what was best for me, but that’s not how the king likes things done. When she snuck into my room late at night, I knew she was up to no good. I couldn’t let her betray my father by taking me away like that. I screamed and screamed my lungs out until the guards came to save me from my mother’s sins.

“Colin, I was just doing what was best for our son! He should not have to grow up in this life, and you know it! You used to think the same way until you were forced to become the master. Atti deserves a better life, Colin.” Her pleading makes my heart sad and my eyes well with tears. I clutch onto my father’s cloak and peer around him, watching my mother as she pleads for her life. She catches my gaze and frowns as tears cascade down her dirty cheeks. “Atti, honey, don’t look, okay? Be a good boy for Mommy. Cover your ears and look away. Just this last time, please listen to me.” My heart feels like it will beat out of my chest, and my cheeks are wet with tears. I give her a nod, covering my ears and closing my eyes.

Even with the pressure of my hands over my ears, I can still hear the shrill screams of my mother as my father sacrifices her to our king, wiping away her sins. Paving a path to righteousness for us. When it’s silent again, I crack my eyes open, and my father is crouched in front of me, removing my small hands from my ears. “You did so well, Atticus. One day, you will continue to lead the disciples along the path of righteousness just as I have done.”

I jolt awake from my recurring nightmare. Sweat coats my body, and my breath sees in and out of my lungs. Scrubbing my hands down my face, I stare up into my own eyes in the mirror on the ceiling above my bed. Bloodshot and haggard from the consistent nightmares and sacrifices being made. The bags under my eyes are dark purple and so sunken that I almost look like a corpse now. I never wanted any of this. I heave asigh, sitting up and swinging my legs over the edge of the bed. Placing my hands on my knees, I dip my head down between them, closing my eyes and focusing on my breathing. My racing heart makes my head throb and tries to pull me back into the memories I try so hard to avoid.

My phone chirps on the bedside table beside me, nearly vibrating off the stand. I grab it and press accept on the call. “What now?” I grunt through the speaker, standing and grabbing my black silk robe from the chair across my bed. “Well? It better be fucking good if you’re disturbing me at six in the morning.” Stalking to the wall of windows on the other side of the room, I peer out at the dense forest before me.

“M-master, I’m so sorry to disturb you this early in the morning. We just got word that the sacrifice has been confirmed. They will be in the king’s chapel in two days' time.” The disciple’s stuttering voice irks me, but the news he carries irritates me even more. You’d think I’d be happy, but the act of killing just doesn’t seem to do it for me anymore. I do it because I have to, not because I want to. Hearing their screams is more difficult these days. I’d rather hear the sweet screams of pleasure than pain. I’ve never heard of them in real life, though, except in the old movies I found in my father’s closet. I don’t even acknowledge the disciple before I hang up the phone. There’s no need to. He knows what’s happening next. It’s the same ritual every single time. Maybe that’s why it doesn’t do it for me anymore.

I rush to dial back the disciple who is handling the sacrifice. He picks up on the first ring. Typical. I don’t let him have a chance to speak before spewing out, “Make sure that they are oblivious to what is happening. I want them dropped off two miles from the site along with others so they won’t realize what’s happening. I want to hunt them.” I hear the gasp on the other side of the line as I mention the hunt. “Do not question yourmaster, Disciple. Do as I ask!” I end the call, tossing my phone onto my bed as a smile of giddy anticipation spreads across my face.

Chapter Three

Ihold my breath as I reach the street corner, swinging my head to the left and right before I jog across to the park. Travis stands there, his hands folded over his chest. My brows pull together as I come to a stop in front of him.

“Hi,” I rasp, breathing heavily just from that little exercise.

“Hi,” Travis says as he glances behind me. Peeking around, my heart drops for a moment thinking someone I know is there, but I don’t see anything.

“I got your message,” he finally says, holding out my bookbag from yesterday. Grabbing it from him, I loop my arm around the handle. I turn around, my eyes snapping to his as I nod.

“Yes,” I breathe out. “Uh, my parents, they’re sending me to some retreat, camp thing, it’s uh…this weekend.”

“What?” he snaps, frowning down at me as if I had any choice in the matter. News flash, I didn’t. I have to do every little thing my parents tell me, or I'll suffer the consequences. And that’s not something I ever enjoy doing.

“Yeah, they’re sending me and some girls from…well, I’m not sure where the girls are from, they didn’t…Dad never told me–”

---