Page 35 of Devoted

“That’s not how it sounded at all, Jess. I guess I’m just asking you to trust me.” I glance over at her for a moment as she determines her answer.

“Okay. I can do that.” Somehow I feel like her agreeing to trust me was a troublesome thing for her to do, and maybe that’s because her heart has been hurt a time or two by putting trust in someone before she was ready. Right then and there, I vow to not make her regret the decision to grant it to me.

I kiss the back of her hand once more, and then concentrate on the drive to the mountains just behind Emerson Falls, taking the winding road up to Hyatt Lake. As we drive, we talk about our childhoods some more since we only scratched the surface at Tony’s. I explain that I’m an only child and my dad wasn’t really around, emphasizing how important my mom is to me without discussing her cancer battle at the moment. She accuses me of being a momma’s boy, and I own it one-hundred percent.

Jess tells me about her younger sister who’s in college at George Fox University up north, getting her master’s degree in school psychology. She tells me stories of how they did nothing but fight growing up, even though she loves her immensely and they talk at least once a week on the phone. She also emphasizes how watching her parents’ marriage and the example they gave her of what true devotion to another person looks like makes her yearn to find that same kind of love.

Not having my own example to look at, I can’t relate on that level. But I think any self-respecting man can accept that when the right woman comes along, she’ll make you change your opinions and ideas about love in a flash.

“Are they still that happy?” I ask as my eyes veer over to catch a glimpse of her. She seemed to retreat a bit as soon as we started to discuss our families.

“Um, they were until my mom died.”

Shit. The last thing I wanted was to shift the energy of our date downhill. “I’m so sorry, Jess. That sucks.” My heart throbs for her, especially since the threat of losing my mom is very real.

She bites her cheek as she stares out the window, avoiding my eyes. “Thank you. It’s been a while now. But I miss her every day.”

“I can only imagine.” I stroke her arm with my hand, providing as much comfort as I can while I drive. “So tell me more about your sister? What’s the worst thing you two did to each other? I didn’t have siblings, you know, so I love hearing about how other people drove theirs nuts.”

She chuckles softly and then stares up at the ceiling in thought. “Well, I did body slam her into the fridge once.”

I let out a quick bark of laughter. “Oh, this story I have to hear.”

Jess describes how her sister broke her porcelain doll, leading to her chasing her around the house and ultimately throwing her into the fridge for the remainder of the drive, alleviating the tension from earlier and putting us back on track for our date.

“Okay, we’re here.” I pull into the small parking lot about fifteen minutes later in front of a log cabin building and tall pine trees stretching behind it for days.

“You can’t be serious,” Jess ridicules and turns to me.

“Oh, I’m serious, babe.”

“Zip lining? Are you out of your mind?” She sits back in her seat, putting considerable distance between us as I watch her eyes light up with fear.

“Jess.” I scoot closer to her over the center console and grab both of her hands. “Look at me.” Her eyes veer over with a mixture of irritation and fear in them. “This is one of the safest adrenaline-seeking activities you can do. The other night at Tony’s when you told me you’ve never done something like this before, do you remember what I told you?”

She’s staring out the front window now, her chest rising and falling in time with her shallow breaths. I know she’s nervous, but I can’t wait to see her face when she flies through the air—because I think she needs this. Jessalyn Harris needs to be pushed so she can live a little, and I want to be there when her world brightens before her eyes.

Suddenly her vision sharpens back on me, looking so deep into my mind that I’m momentarily paralyzed, waiting for what she’s going to say. “That any fear in life is easier to face with someone by your side that you know won’t let you fall.” That’s my girl.

My smile and heart explode with pride. “That’s right. And I asked you to trust me. I won’t let you fall—you believe that, right?”

“Yes.”

“Okay. So let’s go chase the adrenaline.” I hop out of the car and run to her side, helping her up from her seat. “Better bring your coat. When you start flying fast, the air can get pretty brisk.” It’s early April and the weather has been relatively nice, but that chill is still present in the wind from time to time.

Jess grabs her grey jacket, throws her hair in a low ponytail, and then lets me lead her up to the building that houses Hyatt Lake Zip Lining Adventures.

“This is crazy. I mean, I’m excited, but I seriously think I might throw up.” I open the door to the office and lead her inside to the counter for us to check in.

“I know. Isn’t that the best feeling?” I taunt her as she rolls her eyes. “Tell me this. How can you be perfectly normal and at ease in a place like the ER where you never know what’s going to walk through those doors, but then the idea of doing something like zip lining, which is perfectly safe, scares you?”

She leans her head to the side in contemplation, taking a moment to really consider her answer as we wait in line to check in. “I guess with the ER it’s more of the fact that you can’t anticipate what’s going to happen. I mean, I know we get calls from the ambulances when they’re on their way with a patient, but it’s only a matter of minutes that you have to prepare and it’s someone’s life in your hands. But this,” she gestures around the room, “this you know is coming. I have time to imagine all the things that can go wrong or psyche myself out of it, if that makes sense.” She lets out a slight chuckle as we approach the counter.

“Yeah, I can see that. Well, in my defense, I didn’t really tell you where you were going. So think of it as an intense case of adventure coming through the ER and maybe that will help,” I tease her.

She lightheartedly smacks my chest and then peers up at me, silently asking me with her eyes to protect her. “I’ll try.”

Yeah, I’ll try to keep you safe too, Jess.

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