Page 52 of Revived

She raises her brow. “Well, I think it would be nice for him to have a sleepover with his cousins and I know Mom and Dad miss having him around all the time. But honestly, I think it would be good for you and Rachel to have some alone time without Grayson around.”

The minute she says the words, I instantly think of all the things we could do in a house minus a child that could wake up at any moment. And they are not things I want to discuss in detail with my sister.

“What makes you think we need alone time?”

She shakes her head at me. “You don’t know much about women, do you?”

“Uh, newsflash. The last woman I dated was Hannah, so forgive me, but it’s been a while.” Her face instantly softens before she continues.

“You’re right. I’m sorry. Look, I’m not trying to be the nosy, in-your-business sister—”

“Uh, yes you are,” I cut her off.

“Okay, fine. I am,” she says as she waves her hand in the air, accompanying her famous eye roll. “All I’m saying is, you need to spend some time together, just the two of you without him around. Take her out, wine and dine her, show her what she means to you. Because regardless of what you say, Luke, I know she means something to you.”

I exhale in acceptance. “Yeah, she does. My feelings are definitely getting stronger for her, Ten, and it’s fucking terrifying. But I don’t know… there’s something still holding me back. Did I tell you I went to Hannah’s grave on Mother’s Day?”

“No, you didn’t.”

“Well, I did, after Grayson gave me that album that Rachel and Mom made. I freaked out when I saw it, dozens of memories barreling into me like a fucking tsunami. I felt like I was drowning in grief, running from reliving every moment with her because it hurts so fucking bad to think about it, even almost five years later.”

Tenley walks over to me and rests her hands on my shoulders. “I think having Rachel around is forcing you to actually grieve. When Hannah passed, you were handed a shitty stack of cards and your infant son was your first priority. You became consumed with taking care of Grayson and pushed down everything I think you needed to process. There is no timeline for grief, Luke, and certainly no schedule for moving on either. But Rachel is amazing. Just watching her with Grayson on Saturday was enough for me to see what you see in her. And then she and I got to talk a bit too while she was in the kitchen, and damn. She’s the entire package—polite, beautiful, confident, intelligent, driven, compassionate. She’s a catch and if you screw this up, you’ll never forgive yourself.”

“I asked her to give me a sign, Ten…”

“Hannah?”

I nod. “Yeah. I know it sounds crazy…”

“No, Luke. No, it doesn’t sound crazy. I would probably do the same thing if I lost Matthew.”

“But I’ve gotten nothing. Zip, nada. The Kit Kat thing had to be a coincidence because I feel like Hannah would show me, she would give me something to let me know it’s okay to surrender to what I’m feeling.”

Tenley’s arms wrap around my neck now as she pulls me in for a hug, squeezing me so tight. It feels so comforting to hold my sister. Obviously, we talk a few times a week on the phone and we’ve always been close, but nothing can compare to actually having her here.

“Don’t lose faith, Luke. She will. I know my friend. She’s waiting for the perfect moment, and then she’s going to take your breath away.” The image of Hannah walking up our driveway the day I met her for the first time pops into my head, because that’s exactly what she did to me that day. She stole the oxygen straight from my lungs.

“I hope so, Tenley. I need the confirmation. But I do think you’re right,” I relent as we push apart. “I think Rachel and I could use that time, and next weekend is right after finals, so that’s perfect. I’ll be able to relax. Although, no one besides our friends and family knows we’re dating. Taking her out on the town is going to invite all sorts of questions.”

“Screw everyone else, Luke.” Her lips curl up in disgust. “They aren’t living your life, you are. Do what makes you happy. You should know more than anyone that life is too fucking short to care about what other people think.”

Pulling my sister into my arms again, I rest my lips on her temple. “Thank you, Ten. I love you.”

“I love you too, big brother, even when you’re being stubborn.”

“I’m not stubborn!” I scoff as we make our way back to the living room.

“Yeah, okay.”

“There you two are. It’s time to eat.” My mother calls out from the kitchen while we make our way back to the sliding door, about to return to the patio. I catch a glimpse of Rachel sitting in a chair, a light gust of wind blowing a few strands of her hair around her face, her smile bright as always as she watches Grayson play and holds a conversation with my dad. She looks comfortable, peaceful, like she belongs here—and that thought slams into me with full force, my heart pounding in my chest while I process it.

“Come inside and wash up, you guys,” she yells to the kids across the yard while they dash up the porch and rush past her, headed to the bathroom to clean off the dirt and grime that comes from being a child playing outside.

Once everyone makes their food, we all take a seat at the patio table outside, enjoying the evening air that has cooled off as the sun begins to set. The trees help block out the intense rays as the sun slides behind the mountains in the distance, creating a soft orange glow in the sky that reminds me of a tropical smoothie. Birds chirp and fly through the air, chasing each other across the yard, and the smell of the irises in my mother’s planter waft in the breeze.

“Rachel? Did you play with your cousins growing up?” Grayson asks around a mouthful of cheeseburger.

Waiting to answer until after she finishes chewing, Rachel holds up her finger before swallowing. “Yes, I did. I grew up in New York and I had five cousins. We were all very close in age and lived near each other, so we saw each other all the time until I moved away.”

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