Page 16 of Captivated

“Fine by me. You’ve put in your time. Your spousal support will be more than enough to live off of thanks to the pre-nup you signed, and then we can be out of each other’s lives for good.”

Resting my head against the wall, I process the truth about my parent’s marriage, the one that only exists because I was the sperm that won the race. But true to any child’s dreams, the doting family that truly loves one another and wants to be around each other is all I’ve ever wanted. Unluckily for me, that wasn’t the one I was born into.

It wasn’t always like this. Mom and Dad used to be affectionate, thoughtful, and didn’t raise their voices at one another every time they were in the same room. We used to do things as a family—vacations, beach trips, and they would go to every one of my soccer games as I grew up. Now, I’m lucky if they even acknowledge that I’m in the house, let alone think about attending one of my games, where I now play on Varsity as a junior and am the leading scoring forward in the league.

And as I listen to them bicker and yell some more, something in me snaps.

“Why wait until I’m eighteen?” I push into the room where my parents are standing. “Let me emancipate myself and get the hell out of here so you two can go on and live your lives and count me out of it! Don’t use me as an excuse anymore for being miserable… I don’t need you… either of you. It’s not like you care about me at all anyway…”

“Cash, that’s not true. We love you, son… marriage is complicated…” my mother pleads, but she can sense that the damage has been done.

“You think I don’t hear you two screaming at each other every night? And hell, right now, you’re not even trying to hide it! Sorry you knocked up Mom, Dad… sorry that I’m the reason you’re stuck here with us. Who cares about what people think anymore? I sure as hell don’t! I don’t listen to the gossip around school when kids talk about our family. You may think you’re being slick, Dad, but people know you’re acting like a whore!”

“That’s enough!” My dad’s voice bellows in the room, anger coming off of him in waves. And if I didn’t think we weren’t such an even match, I’d be halfway tempted to punch him in the face right now for treating my mother and I this way—for devaluing our family, the way he has for years.

“No one is going anywhere, not until Cash is eighteen. We can’t afford the scandal.”

“That’s all you care about, huh? Your precious reputation! What about me? What about Mom?”

“Us getting married was a mistake, Cash. I’m sorry to tell you this, but it never should have happened. I’m proud of you son for all that you’ve accomplished, but…”

“How can you even say that??!!” I scream, blood boiling dangerously hot beneath my skin. “You don’t give a shit about me and what I do! You can’t be bothered to attend my soccer games and you sure as hell don’t support my dreams!”

“Going into law enforcement is a waste of your looks and family name, Cash… I wish you could see that.”

I shake my head. “That’s all the matters to you—appearances. Well, guess what? I will no longer be a part of it. You want me to keep my mouth shut, then I will no longer be a part of your charade or I will air all of your dirty laundry, starting with the voice recording of this fight,” I threaten as I remove my phone from my pocket, displaying the recording of the entire conversation.

“You little fucker…” my dad lunges for me, but my mother steps in front of him.

“Don’t you dare, Herald. Cash is right. I will no longer stand by this either. Two years and we’re gone,” she stands tall as my father’s eyes bounce back and forth between us.

“Leave me the hell alone… both of you,” I say before turning and walking back to my room.

“Pssst…” Birdies’ call garners my attention as I twist my head to where she stands down the hallway, just outside of my bedroom. She waves me to her and I instantly move faster. Walking through my door, she follows closely behind me and then quietly presses it shut.

“Hi, my boy,” she slightly grimaces as I take a seat on my bed and she follows suit.

“Hey, Birdie.” My body is shaking so violently, I clench my fists at my sides, resting on my bed to stop myself from punching a hole in the wall.

“Do you think that was the best idea, Cash?”

I huff, her question resonating as I contemplate my sarcastic answer. “I think anyone with ears could have heard that fight, Birdie… but at least now I have something to keep my father’s bullshit attitude in check.”

“I’m sorry, Cash. No child should have to be subjected to the misery of their parents like that.”

“But didn’t you hear, Birdie? I’m the reason for their misery. If it weren’t for me, they wouldn’t even be together.”

She tilts her head and then rests her hand on top of mine. “But I would be miserable without you, my boy.”

Emotion clogs my throat. Thank fuck for Birdie. Even as a teenager, I know she’s the only person I can count on. It would be really easy for me to act out, blame every stupid decision I make on the fact that my parents are pieces of shit. But she’s the one who makes me see the light. Always. She’s the one who told me to focus on my education because that is what I can fall back on later. She’s the one who steers me in the right direction of morality when I have an issue with someone at school. And she’s the one who treats me like her own son, more than my parents ever have.

I’d be lost without Birdie—the realization so terrifying, I don’t even like to think about it.

Instead, I listen to everything she says, soak in every morsel of wisdom and truth, and try to keep my head down while counting down the days until I can leave this life behind.

“I’d be miserable without you too, Birdie. I have two more years in this hellhole, and then I’m out. I can’t wait for college so I can move away and never speak to them again.”

“You may not like them right now, but they’re still your parents, Cash. You shouldn’t cut them out completely, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t set hard limits to what you put up with from them.”

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