Page 53 of Eternally Devoted

“I don’t… I don’t know what that means,” Sterling says to him.

I turn to Dash and collect his face in my hands. His breath flanks my nose, and I can literally see his nerves whipping and swirling inside of him. “I feel the exact same way about you as I do about Sterling. Ever since you answered the door here years ago, I’ve held that same spark, the exact same flutter in my veins for you.” He’s not as tall as Sterling but still tall enough that I need to push to my toes to kiss him, too. I like that my guys are both tall, strapping protectors. I just need to make sure they’remyguys.

He wavers a moment before he says, “I’m the happiest when I’m with both of you.”

I nod. “Me too.” We turn to face Sterling, still pressed to the wall in surprise.

“I want you,” I tell him. “I want Dash, too.” I lick my lips, pulse hammering in my throat. I don’t think he’ll say no,but honestly, I’m still nervous. My sweet Sterling truly seems surprised, as if us loving and wanting him is hard to believe.

I fucking hate that.

I hate that secret, deeply rooted insecure side of him.

His voice wobbles just a little as he looks between us. “You’re not gay,” he says to Dash, the statement sounding a lot like a question.

“I’m not… I don’t…” He grips the back of his neck with one hand, pulling at it as he searches for words to define his feelings. “I have never been attracted to a man before.” He swallows, his nostrils flaring. His lips part but it takes a moment for words to come out. “Until you.”

Sterling doesn’t say a word. Not to me or Dash. He simply slips into his chair at the table and nudges our chairs back. “We need to eat and get out there.”

Grabbing Dash by the wrist, I give him an encouraging nod, trying to impart on him that even though we didn’t end up in Sterling’s arms after our confession that it doesn’t mean we won’t eventually get there.

Sterl is processing what he’s heard as much as he’s processing his own desires and feelings. I’ve watched these men together for two years.

I know Sterling feels the same way. He just needs time.

We eat breakfast, and somehow manage to discuss the route we’re taking to all the cleanup sites today—cleanup sites. That’s what Sterl is calling them.

After we finish eating, he feeds the yellow dog out back—where he’s been staying—and tells us he’s gonna get dressed then load the truck. Dash slips into the hallway bathroom fora shower, and once Sterling is in the garage, I sneak into the bathroom.

“It’s me,” I whisper-hiss past the curtain.

He pushes it back, narrowing his gaze through the falling water and steam.

“He needs time, that’s all, okay? Trust me. You should have seen his face when I told him how I felt. I think he honestly thought I was having a stroke.”

Dash slides the curtain closed. “It annoys me that he doesn’t see what we see.”

“What do you mean?”

“In himself,” he says.

“We’ll help correct his vision,” I tell Dash, opening the door to get myself ready. “Don’t worry.”

CHAPTER

TWENTY

HOW DID MY BORING LIFE BECOME A TARANTINO FILM OVERNIGHT?

Sterling

After loading the truck with what I think will be all the supplies we need for today, I head back inside, my mind still a mess.

Juniper wanted me to be her boyfriend all these years? I could’ve sworn she was into Dash. I mean, I’d catch her lookingat him the way I looked at her. Hell, she’s always looking at him the way I want to look at him.

I just never do.

I’ve always been afraid of being the creepy garbage man roommate who stares a little too long. So I’ve been the loyal best friend who ignores the sexiest man alive when he takes a shower next to me outdoors in the dark. The pal who pretends not to see his buddy’s erection while he’s working out. The friend who puts his feet up on the couch on movie night because he’s afraid of what he’ll feel if he sits too close.

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