“Why are you high right now?” she asked him pointblank, fully expecting him to deny it. But he didn’t.
“I just needed a pick-me-up. That’s all. It’s… hard to get through the day sometimes. You know, to get through the day without it.”
“You’re going to have to, Wayne, or I won’t be helping you. I won’t interact with you in any way unless you quit. You understand me? I can’t afford to assist you unless you promise me you’ll go into rehab. That you’ll stop this permanently. And even then, our marriage is over. I might be able to be your friend, butus—you and me—we’re done romantically.” She gestured back and forth between them.
That made him double over and sob all over again, but he didn’t become violent. He didn’t even get loud when he spoke up again.
“I… I’ll do it. You’re right. I’ll do it. Just don’t chuck me out.”
“And I’m not returning with you to California. Kara isn’t, either. She doesn’t need to go through another upheaval, and shedeserves a father who can be healthy and clean for her. We have a life here. We’vebuilta life here, and I’m not letting you destroy it.” He shook his head no. “Do you hear me, Wayne? We’re not leaving. But if you’ll do what you promised, I’ll help you find a rehab program.”
He nodded vigorously. “Okay. I will. I’m sorry. So, so sorry.”
So, Joy used the time difference in her own favor and contacted his current employers at the soap opera’s main business office. After explaining the situation, leaving out certain details like her restraining order or his behavior at her place the week prior, she waited to hear their verdict. Honestly, she didn’t have that much hope for his new role. Not after he’d come over to meet with her as high as a kite again.
Amazingly, one of the producers agreed to work with him if he completed the program with flying colors. A producer who proved to be her friend Debbie’s direct supervisor. She even knew of a facility to place him.
“My older brother went through rehab. It saved his life. Maybe it’ll save Wayne’s,” she said.
From there ittook six weeks for Wayne to complete the program. In the meantime, Joy continued to stay in Montana and work at Salon 406. Kara continued to go to school. And everything became steady again. Normal. Or as normal as people in such weird and upended scenarios could be.
Except for how much she missed Aaron. That wasn’t normal at all.
If she’d thought missing her husband had been terrible—and it had, to be fair—doing without Aaron was a whole new sort of awful. Because Joy had had to learn to be self-sufficient without Wayne, she’d learned to go through things the hard way. And every time he was there he’d tended to mess up situations rather than make them better.
Aaron had been the exact opposite. He had improved her life in countless ways, and his absence felt more like the phantom pains from a missing limb. The kind that twinged incessantly. The kind that she was pretty sure would always twinge. And the kind that might prove to stay just as gone.
She wasn’t sure after all these weeks that Aaron wanted to come back. That he wanted anything to do with her anymore. Not after she’d had to reject him this second, so much more important, time.
Joy sometimes wondered if realizing her feelings for him late might not have been a blessing in disguise. Because if she’d had to break things off with him after declaring what she felt? That would’ve been far more excruciating. Probably for them both.
Still, she received a present in the mail three days after Wayne was released from rehab. A large manila-type envelope arrived, and upon opening it, her heart bounced in her chest. This was better than anything she could’ve hoped for. Better than anything she could’ve predicted might come out of all these wild events.
In a state of glee, she hopped in her remarkably old Toyota. Kara was staying over at a friend's house that night—she’d finally made a close friend—and the two of them had been moved back into their garage apartment for over a month now. This would be the most ideal time to go.
All hyped up, Joy twisted her key in the ignition only to have nothing happen. There was no cranking or grinding noise, no lights coming on her dash, nothing.
“Oh, no. Not now. Please, not now…”
But trying to turn the engine over three more times resulted in the same outcome each time. Joy sat there behind her steering wheel with her head in her hands. She’d just started to contemplate other alternatives when someone else pulled in right beside her. Someone with a recognizable Chevy Silverado. Someone who’d already exited to pause right beside her door.
Except it wasn’t just any someone, it was the man she’d been yearning to see. The man she’d been attempting to go visit. She hand cranked her window down. At least that part still worked.
“Aaron…”
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
HearingJoy’s voice after doing without it for all these weeks made him think of angel choirs and fictional goddesses from ancient stories. It’d been harder than he could’ve imagined to do without her for so long, and maybe he shouldn’t be here now. But he was.
He needed to be.
Or at least, that was what he kept telling himself.
He handed over his reason—excuse—to be here. “These are for Kara,” he told Joy as she stood there looking more beautiful than any woman had the right to be with her green-gray eyes sparkling at him as though misty. That must be his imagination, though. It would be impossible for her to feel his absence as keenly as he’d felt hers.
He’d always felt more strongly than she did. Always.
Joy glanced down, taking in what he’d handed her. “Coloring books?”