Page 17 of Reverse Perspective

“I don’t have an issue with girls or anything. I just tend to get along better with guys since I was bullied so severely by the girls in school. I never had issues with guys.”

“Well… that’s because everyone knew not to fuck with you,” Lance says.

“Yeah. Not to say more people would have bullied you or anything, but everyone knew what would happen if they fucked with you. The girls can really do a lot, but we helped when we could,” Dean continues.

“Yeah. You guys and basically the entire football team always stood up for me in high school,” I say.

“Well, either way,” Mason says. “Since we don’t have a meeting, we should talk.”

“About?” I ask innocently.

“About?” Dean asks, stepping close.

“What are you, a mockingbird?” I ask.

“How about we talk about how I had you coming on my hand Saturday night?” Dean asks as he grabs the back of my neck and lifts my chin with his thumb. “How about we talk about how you were fucking dripping for us by the time I teased that tight little pussy.”

“I’m a virgin. You can’t talk to me like that or you’ll give me a heart attack,” I say and he smirks. “I was given some solid advice today and I’m gonna take it.”

“Which was?” Lance asks. He and Mason are so close that I can feel the warmth of everyone’s body surrounding me.

“Mhmm,” I say. “Todd said I need to make you all earn it and essentially reject you until the doubt that I have goes away.”

“Unfortunately, that’s really good advice,” Dean says. “Remind me to thank him later for that.”

“He’s right though,” Lance says. “Nothing should happen if you have any doubt.”

“I don’t have any doubt in what I think or feel,” I say. “I have doubts about what you three think and feel. Also, I don’t even know what you think or feel… so… maybe that’s a good place to start.”

“I think this is a conversation better suited for home,” Dean says.

“You only say that because I can’t run away from you there,” I say.

“You did Saturday,” Dean shrugs.

“You let me run away. Don’t try to pretend like you couldn’t have stopped me,” I say and he smiles.

“Even then, let’s talk about this at home,” he says as he pulls me closer and kisses my forehead.

He’s never done that. Not like that at least. He’s never let his lips linger on me before as if soaking in everything he can about me. He’s never pulled me against his chest and looked down at me like I’m next on the menu.

“Nu-uh. You can’t do that,” I say as I force myself back up. He smirks at me and it’s becoming apparent that they are going to push me until I break.

We are learning more about our relationship through a reverse perspective where we were friends first and later developed into more. We have always shared this incredible bond together but now that we are noticing these changes; we are having to step back and look at it in a different way to gain a deeper understanding of what the others are feeling. I always viewed our friendship as me falling for them while they always saw me as someone equivalent to a sister. Now that I am finally accepting that I was wrong about how they saw me, I am having to go back and relearn all of the subtle hints they dropped over the last twenty years. They, in turn, have to do the same for me.They are also just now understanding my feelings, so they are having to go back and differentiate between the times I saw our relationship as a friendship and the times that I was hoping for more.

Chapter five

Sadie

What a fucking tripthis week has been. All week the guys have made a point to be more vocal with their feelings. That sounds simple, but when we got home on Monday, they got me to sit down and had me spell out my feelings for them. I was so uncomfortable, but they were patient with me and not once did I feel like I was being judged.

I gave them a severely watered-down version of my feelings. I would never admit out loud that I inadvertently have sex toys dedicated to each of them. Why? I don’t know. It started off as a little joke with myself, imagining what each of them would be like. From there, they each took on a fantasy of their own.

Instead of telling me what their feelings were, they simply told me that they would show me. I didn’t understand what that meant until the next day. I went to the basement Tuesday morning to run and the first thing out of their mouth was the usual “Good morning. How are you? How’d you sleep?” At that moment, it hit me that I didn’t need some grand gesture fromthem and they knew it. They knew I just needed time to accept what I already knew. They have always cared about me, and as a group, we have always checked in with one another to make sure we are doing okay. No matter if it was in stressful situations or if we were having the greatest day of our lives, we still made sure to check in with each other. Emotionally, we’ve been in a relationship for our entire lives and this week has shown that.

It’s not like suddenly they are calling me beautiful when they didn’t before or going out of their way to do sweet things. No. They’ve always done those things. Every morning before work, one or all of them tell me I look beautiful. One of us always makes coffee for the others. We always make sure that the others have eaten breakfast.

Wednesday, Dean found a bug in one of our systems that was causing some issues. He was unbelievably stressed trying to figure this out before the update release Wednesday night. Lance made him stop and take a deep breath. I saw him do with Dean what they all do for me.

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