Page 154 of Delilah In Discretion

At least I had some time to process Michael coming back into my life. Even if he tried to use me for extortion, I was given time to adjust to him appearing in my life. And as my biological mother sat before me, I almost wished she would give me the same courtesy… minus the attempted kidnapping.

Am I dreaming?

“What—what are you doing here?” I asked, seemingly out of breath, and she shrugged, looking off into the distance for a moment.

“I don’t know, really. I haven’t seen you since you were just a child. You probably hate me for all I know... By the way, speaking of deadbeat parents, how’s Michael? Did he visit yet?” she asked, and it took me a moment to realize she was waiting for my response as her eyes landed on me once again.

“He’s dead,” I whispered, and she nodded.

“Figures... The idiot couldn’t hold on to much anyway, much less hold onto his life,” she muttered angrily, and she sighed. “Tell me, was it your uncle?”

I nodded slowly. She smiled softly, and I sat frozen in my seat.

“How... why... when—” I tried to begin, and she stopped me.

“Delilah... honey, if we’re going to get anywhere, you need to calm down. And no, I’m not going to kidnap you or do anything to you. I’m here to talk to you, honestly,” she assured me, and I did my best to calm my racing heart. Just a few minutes ago, I was enjoying my time with Archer… Who would’ve known I would be facing the woman who made me hope and wish for a family when I was just four years old?

“You know... you remind me so much of Brielle: you’re almost perfect. Every woman wants to be you, and every man wants tobe with you. No wonder Archer and Luca are smitten with you,” she muttered.

I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. There were so many things I wanted to say. So many things that were buried and forgotten to hide the pain. But there was only one thing I could say, one thing that tormented me my entire life:

“You abandoned me,” I said softly.

She simply stared at me. “I didn’t want a child, Delilah. I would have given you up either way, but for some reason, I wanted Brielle to take you. Whether it was for you to have a better life or for her to have a worse one, I still don’t know,” she responded bluntly.

I was taken aback. Tears sprang to my eyes at her revelation, and I seethed as I tried to control my voice and temper.

“Why tell me this? Do you want me to hate you even more?!”

“Why yes... I want you to know the type of person I am. I’m not going to lie or sugarcoat anything. Michael tried that, and look where he is now. I don’t need to lie to my… well… to Brielle’s daughter.”

I crossed my arms, still enraged and confused. “So why now? Why would you even come if your only goal was to make me hate you?”

“Because... I’m screwed up. Even though I don’t deserve your love, a part of me still loves you. I don’t want your pity, forgiveness, or love. I just wanted to see you. The little girl who has grown into so much more than I have and will ever be. You deserve the world, Delilah… I’m happy Brielle and Killian were able to give it to you—something I don’t think I would have ever been able to do,” she said, and only then did I notice the real emotion within her eyes.

My biological mother, Marissa… is cold-hearted and honestly terrifying to me. But I could tell she was telling the truth...something I didn’t entirely want to hear, but which I needed to hear to feel sane and at peace with myself.

“I am selfish. I deprived you of a childhood that you deserved, and I am sorry that you had to experience such a thing. I’m sorry that I wasn’t the mother you needed, and I’m not asking for any sort of forgiveness. I just want you to understand how remorseful I am, and maybe you’ll be able to find peace within yourself sooner rather than later.”

I remained silent. What could I say? What did I want to say?

Nothing. I had no response. It was not okay, and I did not forgive her, but hearing her point of view was helpful—nice even.

We sat in silence for a moment or two before she stood up silently with a blank look in her eyes.

“Take care of yourself, Delilah. Take care of Brielle and Eugene as well for me, please,” she muttered, and for some reason, I felt something in the pit of my stomach.

“I’ll never see you again… will I?”

She gave me a weak smile as tears filled her eyes. “Depends on the mercy your uncle is willing to give me.”

Knowing Uncle Eugene, I knew that this would be the last time I’d ever see her.

She began walking away, and as if on instinct, my hand shot out and grabbed hers. She stopped for a moment and looked at our intertwined hands. A few tears fell down her face as she rubbed the back of my hand with her thumb twice... before pulling away and essentially walking out of my life.

Kimi slowly approached with our coffee, and I laid my head on her shoulder as she sat beside me.

“Are you okay, Dee?” she asked, knowing how much I’d endured in the past few days.

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