Page 74 of Timeless: Encore

“Look, I’m sorry for bringing up old shit. All of that’s in the past. It is. I’d hoped after the custody shit got resolved we’d get back to fourteen-year-old Zane and Fee. Best friends who loved and believed in each other unconditionally. We’re not there, though.” Zane flops on his back. “Ty’s meltdown put things into perspective. I just can’t lie to myself. I want all of you. I’m so tired of pretending things are fine when they’re fucked …”

Now, I’m pissed. I shove his shoulder. “So, let me get this straight. Just because I’m self-conscious about my weight means you think I’m holding myself back? Somehow my own insecurity is dredging up old history? That’s some serious bullshit. I’m offended that—“

“No! You aren’t listening. It has nothing to do with your fucking weight.“ He rolls back over to his side and taps my forehead. “It has to do with your head. You are my wet dream. I don’t ever want to put my dick into anyone else for the rest of my life. Because I fucking worship you. I worship your fucking body. I worship your mind. It isn’t about sex, Fee. It’s about trust.You. Still. Don’t. Fucking. Trust. Me.”

I’m stunned silent. “That’s not true.”

“It is,” he says softly. Sadly. Devastatingly.

Then he turns back over. Scoots to the edge of the bed. Pulls the covers over his head.

My world collapses for the second time in two days.

If he’s right …

He is.

How long will it be until he leaves? Just like my mother said he would.

Chapter twenty-four

ZANE

A Couple of Weeks After Fee's Overdose

Theguiltiskillingme.

Am I the right man for Fiona? Are we really each other’s halves?

Are we just codependent?

Maybe, Fee’s my addiction.

These thoughts whirl around my brain on a loop. It’s been that way for three solid days. How the fuck did we get back here? I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. My entire life has come to a head.

Ty’s in a mental health facility in Arizona, with Zoey by his side. He won’t be out for months.

Jace nearly lost Alex when she had another miscarriage.

Connor was implicated in the craziest scandal I’ve ever heard of, now he and Ronni are mired in more legal shit.

My band’s still broken up.

Gus and the Mission are closed.

Carter’s recovering.

Faye hasn’t bothered to respond to my text telling her what happened to Fiona.

Fee and I are still holding on by a string. Despite my own shortcomings, I will never be the one who gives up on us. I’ll fight for her until the end. I hope she’ll continue to fight for us too. Time will tell.

My phone buzzes. It’s Iris Adler of The Seasons Change. I cancelled my plans to jam with them at their kick-off show in LA. I let it go to voicemail. Nothing’s more important than this appointment. I’ll call her back later. Apologize to the band. My focus and attention is right here. Right now.

I’m in the waiting room at Fiona’s therapist’s office. She finally agreed to go to counseling after her overdose. Individual sessions for now. I’ll join her soon for couples counseling. Mia has her own therapist, we didn’t want to make any mistakes with our daughter. Not when we both know all too well how the trauma of finding a parent can fuck with your mind …

Yeah. History motherfucking repeated itself with me and Fee. We’re not letting it happen with Mia.

“Mr. Rocks, would you mind joining us in Dr. Calder’s office?” A nurse pops her head out the waiting room door.