Page 2 of In a Pickle

“Oooh! Oooh!” cried Milena suddenly, raising her hand as if she were in a sixth grade classroom. “I’ve got an idea! A really good idea!”

“Uh oh,” said Deb. “If Milena thinks it’s a good idea, we’d better all duck and cover.”

“Shut up, Ms. Stuck-Up Teacher. I’ve got a wonderful idea. Liana, you simply must come to this week’s pickleball class with us!”

Ana rolled her eyes. “Liana doesn’t want to hang out with her mom’s friends. We are a bunch of middle-aged women, Milena. Let the girl spend her time with people her own age.”

“Let her speak for herself!” insisted Milena. She turned to Liana. “I promise, pickleball is amazing when you’re recovering from surgery. You know I had a hysterectomy last year, and that’s when I signed us all up for pickleball over at the Pine Heights Country Club. It’s been the best thing for us — all of us — but especially me, gaining my confidence back after my health challenges. You can make pickleball as difficult or as easy as you want it to be, and it’s an open class, meaning there are all skill levels. Including some ninety-year-old ladies who can barelywalk two steps. Trust me, everyone is welcome. Even Ana has been able to play with her bad knee, and it’s been great.”

“It has,” Ana agreed begrudgingly.

“I have heard good things about pickleball from my mom,” Liana said. “Mom, what do you think? Should I go to the class?”

“It’s up to you, honey. You might enjoy it, and I agree that you can use the class to ease back into exercise, but you would be the youngest person in the class by quite a few years. It’s completely up to you. No pressure.”

Ana nudged Liana with her elbow. “If it influences your decision, it doesn’t hurt that our instructor is a real looker.” She gave Liana a knowing side glance.

Karen nodded vigorously and fanned herself to emphasize the point. “He’s so dreamy. And he’s just about your age, Liana.”

“Oh, and he tells the wittiest jokes!” Milena added. “That man is just full of jokes! Last Tuesday, I hit such a terrible shot, straight at his head. He jumped out of the way, but I was just so embarrassed! But James goes, ‘Don’t worry, Milena, the ball can be a fickle pickle.’ He has so many puns, and he just pulls them out of his hat. He comes up with them on the spot, like that!” She snapped for emphasis.

Liana thought the man might come up with his jokes in advance, but what did she know? Plus, she didn’t want to ruin Milena’s fun. “I’ll think about joining the class,” said Liana, still unsure, but wanting to appease Milena.

The rest of the brunch passed uneventfully, and the women parted with many cheek kisses and promises to invite Liana to the next boozy brunch. Deb was slightly tipsy, so Liana decidedshe would walk the three blocks to get the car and drive back to the restaurant to pick her mom up.

Just as Liana reached the car, she heard someone call her name from down the block. She turned to find a beautiful woman with shiny hair, dressed in a white Alo workout set and resplendent in a full face of glam makeup.

“Hey, Jessica!” Liana tried to muster up some enthusiasm to greet her former high school classmate, suddenly embarrassed that she hadn’t bothered to put on any makeup for brunch with her mom’s friends. Jessica Barnes was the same beauty she had been at eighteen, aside from a few noticeable additions like eyelash extensions and lip fillers.

“Oh my gosh, I thought that was you!” Jessica gushed, pulling Liana in for a hug and air kiss. Jessica smelled like some sort of expensive floral perfume. “It’s been forever! Like, I don’t think I’ve seen you since new year’s eve of our sophomore year of college! How are you? Are you still living in L.A.?”

“I’m doing well. I actually just moved back here.”

“That’s great! We should hang out soon. Maybe a hot girl walk? Ooh, or a kickboxing class. I’ve been soooo into kickboxing these days. That’s where I’m headed right now, actually. Equinox just started this new kickboxing circuit class, and it totally kicks my ass, but it’ll make your legs look amazing.” Jessica eyed Liana up and down, and Liana sensed Jessica zeroing in on Liana’s scrawny figure, her distinct lack of muscles or curves, and her spindly legs that just three months ago were too weak even to carry her up a flight of stairs.

Liana wanted to melt into the ground, or to tell Jessica that even if, by some miracle, she made it through more than threeminutes of a kickboxing class, there was no way she could afford an Equinox membership. Instead, she said, “Yeah, that’d be great.”

She told herself to be open to Jessica’s friendship; she needed more friends now that she’d moved back to Miami. But damn, why did this city have to be so small? Why couldn’t she have one brunch without running into someone she knew?

“What are you doing these days?” asked Jessica. “Are you still working at that big Hollywood studio?”

“No, I’m actually between jobs since I decided to move back to Miami,” Liana said, cursing herself for her honesty. She should have made up some job, any job, so as not to sound so pathetic in front of Jessica.

“They wouldn’t let you go remote, huh?” Jessica stuck out her plump lower lip sympathetically. “Some companies are still so old-fashioned. Like, we’re living in the post-pandemic world, but some companies are out there pretending it’s 1995 and the internet doesn’t exist.”

Liana decided not to correct either of Jessica’s assumptions: that there was no internet in 1995, and that Liana had quit her job over the issue of remote work. Hoping to change the subject, she asked Jessica, “What do you do?”

“Oh, I work in marketing at Salesforce!” Jessica said excitedly. Clearly she’d wanted Liana to ask. “I actually just got promoted to senior manager!”

“Congrats,” said Liana in what she hoped was a sufficiently enthusiastic voice.

“Thanks!” said Jessica. “Oh, and look!” She thrust the back of her left hand at Liana’s face, and Liana was momentarily blinded by a giant diamond ring.

“Johnny proposed!” Jessica squealed. Liana vaguely recalled seeing a guy in Jessica’s recent TikToks.

“That’s great. How did he propose?” She figured Jessica would love talking about that.

Jessica’s face lit up. “Oh, it was incredible. He took me to dinner at Papi Steak, and afterward, we went for a walk along the water. We saw this old guy driving a yacht, and he pulled up next to us, and Johnny goes, ‘Let’s get on.’ It turns out, it was our yacht! Johnny bought a yacht! Can you believe it?”

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