Page 43 of In All My Dreams

The first kiss we shared was a mix of sticky lips and tasted of blue cotton candy and churros, and I’d be lying to myself if I wasn’t thinking of replicating that same kiss at this exact moment. I know I put the brakes on whatever this started to be when we got a little too drunk in the library. But I can’t breathe when he’s in the same room as me, let alone listen to my brain’s reasoning. Especially when my heart is pleading, begging even, to lean in to kiss him again.

Ian takes the bag of cotton candy from me, our fingers brushing slightly. Fire burns in my lungs as I remember those same fingers cupped around my face just the other night, kissing me thoroughly.

Somehow, we still ended up wrapped in each other's arms by the end of the night.

“Oh, speaking of food,” Ian says excitedly as he reaches into the backpack he’s wearing. “I brought these for you.” He hands me a bag of Hot Cheetos, a Chesire cat grin on his face.

I take them and roll my eyes at him. “I can’t believe you still remember how much I love these.” I grin up at him.

“I remember everything that you love, Georgia.” His voice hits me like a soft caress against my already heated senses, and I feel the blush creep up my neck and into my cheeks.

“Are you blushing for me, Georgie?” Ian smirks.

“Eww, no. It's just the heat.”

He leans in, his lips a hair's breadth from my ear, and whispers, “Friends, right?”

I clear my throat and glance over at Auden, who is still devouring her cotton candy. Her hands and face are covered in a pink sticky mess. It’s hard to just want to be friends when the three of us fit together like a natural, real family. Especially here. All around us, there are happy little families. Riding the rides together, eating at tables, laughing. All of them seem so happy.

I look up at Ian, and my reflection stares back at me through the lens of his sunglasses. If I look a little closer, I wonder if I can see the lies written all over my face. Instead, I flash a smile at Ian before stepping closer to him.

“Friends, yes,” I whisper into his ear, inhaling the sandalwood and citrus scent that seems to always surround him. “But maybe, something more, too?”

I place my hand on his chest. His ragged breathing matches my own as his heart races in tune with mine. I step back, putting some distance between us, before he grabs my hand that still lingers on his chest. Giving Auden another glance, I make sure that she’s completely occupied with her snack before I look back up at Ian. My hand is clutched in his, my palm sitting flushagainst his heart as he leans in and brushes his lips against mine softly. Just a peck, really. But it’s enough to set my skin ablaze all over again.

Ian pulls away all too soon, his mouth moving from my lips to my ear again. “Something more, I think,” he whispers before finally stepping away from me and smiling down at me like I’ve captured the sun just for him.

“What ride should we all go on next?” Auden’s voice jars me like a jug of ice-cold water being poured over my head. “I vote for the haunted house!”

Ian chuckles next to me. “Why don’t we go get cleaned off first? Then we can definitely go into the haunted house. Maybe it’ll scare your mom like it did the first time we went in it.”

Auden looks down at her pink-stained hands and then back at us. “When did you come here without me?”

“I’ll tell you on the walk to the bathroom,” Ian tells her as he holds out his arm like a fancy prince from a Disney movie.

She wraps her arm through his, and I follow behind them toward the bathrooms near the back of the fairgrounds.

“I’m waiting for the story,” Auden sasses. One day, she’s going to get in trouble for that attitude, but at five years old, it’s just a little cute. Plus, Ian could use some sass in his life once in a while.

“Okay, so, when your mom and I were teenagers, I asked her on a date and brought her here,” he tells her. “We went to the haunted house, and I was hoping she’d get scared enough to finally hold my hand,” Ian continues with a wink thrown back at me over his shoulders.

I roll my eyes, but I’m secretly loving hearing his side of this story. I vividly remember Ian screaming like a banshee and me having to basically carry his ass through the rest of the haunted house.

“We were in this room that had this really scary clown.” Ian stops and looks down at Auden. “If there’s one thing you need to know about me, it’s that I don’t mess around with clowns. Especially the scary ones. Your mom made me watchItwith her, like, five hundred times, and Pennywise still scares the crap out of me.”

Auden giggles and turns to look at me. “I guess we can’t ever go to the circus with Ian, Mom.”

“I will absolutely be forcing Ian to a circus one day,” I tease. “That is a promise.”

“Ian, do you know where California is?” Auden asks. “Because they always have a really big circus where we live, and maybe one day you can come visit us after we have to go back.”

Ian looks over his shoulder at me, a wistful sort of smile playing on his lips.

“Wait, what happened in the clown room?” Auden asks as we step up to the bathrooms.

“How about you go wash your hands, really, really, well. And then I’ll finish telling you. Deal?” Ian holds out his pinky, then pulls it back when he sees her pink hands. “How about we shake on that deal once your hands aren’t pink anymore?”

Auden rolls her eyes at him with a playful smile. “Deal! I’ll be right back! You guys better not go to the haunted house without me!”

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