Page 65 of Best Laid Plans

A groan broke from him. He enfolded her against the wonderful warmth and familiar strength of his chest and she could feel his heart knocking against hers.

‘I was so angry with Josh,’ he said. ‘I was scared he wouldn’t love you enough. Scared that he wouldn’t try hard enough to make you happy and keep you happy.’

‘Oh, Will.’

‘We had a terrible row just before he took off in the plane.’

Lucy leaned back and looked up at him, saw horror and tenderness warring in his eyes. ‘How awful.’

‘I feel sick every time I think about it.’

‘That’s a terrible burden to have carried all these years.’

‘Yes. I’ve blamed myself for a long time.’

She wanted to ease the pain in his eyes. ‘But it wasn’t your fault. Josh always made his own decisions.’

He nodded sadly. ‘Short of holding a gun to his head, I couldn’t have stopped him.’

Lucy shivered and took a step out of the comforting circle of his arms. She wished that her confession had brought her a sense of peace.

‘It was nice of you to offer to court me,’ she said and she pressed a fist against her aching heart, as if somehow she could stop it from bleeding. ‘If you don’t mind, I think I’d rather not go on dates.’

‘But –’ Will began.

Lucy hurried on. ‘I think it would be better if we just stick with friendship.’

‘Why?

‘We’ve managed well as friends for a long time now.’

‘But – but haven’t you just said that you loved me?’

Oh, God.

Her heart stopped.

Will sent her a bewildered little smile. ‘You don’t have a monopoly on mistakes, Lucy.’

She felt rooted to the floor. ‘What do you mean? Have you made mistakes?’

His smile tilted with faint irony. ‘Self-delusion tops my list.’

Tears burned her eyes but she dashed them away because she wanted to see the raw emotion in Will’s face. She’d never seen anything more beautiful.

‘I’ve always cared about you, Lucy. I’ve always wanted to make you happy, but somehow –’ He gave a sad shake of his head. ‘Somecrazyhow – I couldn’t see what that caring really meant.’

His eyes shimmered brightly. ‘I made my first terrible mistake when you kissed me goodbye.’ He reached for her hand. ‘That was the kiss to end all kisses. I should have bound you tomy side and never let you out of my sight. Instead, I was a fool, and I took off overseas.’

‘I didn’t know you liked that kiss,’ she whispered.

He gave an abrupt laugh. ‘I tried to tell myself I’d read that kiss wrongly. I decided that maybe you were a particularly talented kisser, and you kissed everyone that fabulously.’

‘Not a chance, Will.’

‘I spent far too much time on that first trip trying to forget you.’ He tucked a curl behind her ear. ‘I think that was about mistake number thirty-three.’

Lucy could hear the frantic beating of his heart and she realised the wind and rain had stopped. ‘Were there any more mistakes?’

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