Page 27 of His Best Friend's Baby

Goodwill, it seemed, had been arriving from every direction. Seth had even brought a television and set it up in the lounge room and together, sitting in the camp chairs that Polly now found quite comfortable, they’d watched a rerun ofCasino Royale, a Bond movie they’d first watched during their final year in high school.

Summer had obligingly waited until the movie was almost over before she’d woken for her feed.

‘How about I make us hot chocolate while you take care of her?’ Seth called after Polly as she headed off to collect her bub.

‘I’d love that, thanks.’

She brought Summer back with her and used the draped muslin wrap as she nursed her. Seth set a lovely big mug of luscious hot chocolate on a low stool beside her and he resumed his place in the other chair. Some kind of game show had started on the TV, but he turned the volume down so it wouldn’t disturb Summer. The faint chatter and laughter in the background was strangely comforting.

‘You know motherhood suits you,’ Seth said quietly.

Polly smiled. ‘You sound almost as surprised about that as I am.’

‘Weren’t you expecting to enjoy being a mother?’

‘I was certainly hoping I’d love it. I guess I was worried though—as I hadn’t had a mother of my own. I wasn’t sure I’d have the right instincts or something.’

‘I guess that’s understandable. But you needn’t have worried. You’re doing just great.’

Polly looked down at the cherubic little face at her breast, the fat cheeks puffing, and the lurch of love that she felt still seemed like a miracle. ‘I think maybe babies have a way of teaching their mothers.’

‘Maybe.’ Seth’s voice sounded extra rough now and he was frowning as he sipped from his mug.

Polly wondered if she’d said something wrong. Perhaps she should try to explain herself.

‘This might sound like really weird logic,’ she said, ‘but I was actually hoping that if I had my own baby and took really good care of her, it could be my way of giving something back to my mother. I—I owed her my life. So much. And I wanted to be the mum that she couldn’t be. To make the most of the life she gave me.’ She chanced a shy smile. ‘Understanding algorithms didn’t feel like enough.’

For a long time, Seth didn’t answer this and Polly was really wishing she’d kept her mouth shut. She’d never been very good at expressing what she really needed to say. Her dad had been the same. They’d connected best through their puzzle obsession.

Hoping to prompt Seth, she said, ‘That did sound weird, didn’t it?’

He shook his head. ‘Not weird at all, Pollz. It makes sense on so many levels.’

This was a relief. And she was grateful that Seth hadn’t responded by pointing out Summer’s lack of a father. Polly knew firsthand how important fathers were, but she couldn’t raise that subject, even though Seth was probably itching to understand why she’d wanted to be a single mum.

That explanation would be way too embarrassing. She still cringed whenever she remembered how she’d dumped her stupid IVF request on him out of the blue. But she certainly didn’t want to explain that her IVF plan had been the result of a decade of dating disasters.

‘Summer’s finished,’ she said and then, in a bid to ease any awkwardness she might have created, ‘Would you like to hold her for a bit? See if she needs to burp?’

‘Sure.’ At least Seth was smiling as he took the warm little bundle into his arms and then settled her rather expertly over his shoulder.

‘Here, you might need this too.’ Polly offered him a towelling bib. ‘In case she spits up.’

‘Thanks. I know all about that. My nephew Archie could spit for Australia.’

They shared smiles. But Polly was sure their smiles were a little strained. It was almost as if they both realised this idyllic domesticated scenario was a mirage. An illusion that couldn’t possibly last.

*

She felt rathersubdued after Seth left. She was conscious that it would be oh so easy to allow his generosity and all the other examples of Wirralong thoughtfulness to steer her from her original course.

It was time to remember she was a city girl now. She didn’t belong here anymore.

As she rinsed the clinging grains of chocolate and stacked their mugs in the dishwasher, she found herself recalling how clear-headed and focused she’d been when she’d first driven out to Wirralong a year ago. Her aim back then had been a quick visit, in and out, with no intention of staying.

Sure, her first sight of Wirralong had caused a nostalgic ‘moment’. She’d become a bit weepy thinking about the happy schooldays she’d spent here, but that mental lapse had been over in no time. For the past fifteen years, she’d been a Melbournite. And she still enjoyed the stimulation of that busy city, thank you very much.

And yet, Seth and these warm-hearted women seemed intent on luring her into their cosy, country town lifestyle.

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