Page 103 of A War Apart

Blood.

My courses.

My heart clenched. It should have relieved me, but…

I glanced at Alexey, his dark figure limned with firelight. His breathing was deep and even.

I’d known it wasn’t the right time for a child. Not with him, not with me in this body. But I’d wanted to be a mother for so long. That dream had been taken from me, first during the years of infertility, then when my son had died, and finally, when I’d thought Han was dead. Wrong though it might have been, I’d wanted to have that chance again.

Otets, what was wrong with me? My husband was alive, and I was mourning the fact that I wasn’t pregnant with another man’s child.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. It wasn’t the right time. He wasn’t the right man. And maybe—maybe I wasn’t the right woman, either.

Chapter thirty-six

March

Han

Three days on the road. My muscles ached, and not with the pleasant burn of exercise. The plodding pace set by an army redefined the wordtired.I’d be glad to reach the capital, just to end the monotony of the journey.

And to be near Mila. We’d still had no word. What if the tsar was wrong? What if shehadbeen arrested with the baron and baroness? What if something had happened since then? The crawl of information across the country grated on me. At least when we reached the capital, I’d be with her. I’d find a way into the palace and bring her out myself.

The late afternoon shadows cast an eerie look over the snow-covered landscape. Ahead of me, the train slowed, sleighs coming to an unscheduled stop on the road.

The hairs on the back of my neck prickled, and I scanned the trees and bushes bordering each side of the road. The stop couldhave been due to something as simple as a horse throwing a shoe or a sleigh going off the road, but something felt wrong. This was the perfect place for an ambush. Low hills all throughout this part of the country made it easy to hide the approach of a small group of attackers.

I wheeled my horse around and rode down the line, speaking to the men under my command. “On your guard,” I said. Silence fell as we waited for whatever was coming. I hooked my iron hand around the hilt of my sword and drew it, listening for the sounds of approaching enemies.

Shouts rang out from the back of the train, further down the road. Moments later, I heard the clash of steel on steel. Battle had been joined.

“Steady,” I called to my men. We couldn’t abandon our position. Not until we knew if it was a targeted attack on the back of the line. “Hold.” My eyes darted around. Every hint of movement could be one of Miroslav’s men, and the trees were too dense to see clearly.

Soldiers darted from between the trees, charging toward us.

“For Borislav!” I bellowed, raising my sword. My men echoed the cry as the enemy reached us.

I swung my sword into the neck of one of the oncoming soldiers, turning just in time to see one of my men fall, then another. I wheeled around, searching for my next target. Further down the line, I could see moving shadows—the Drakra. Darkness swirled around each Drakra warrior, a cloud of black that left carnage in its wake.

I didn’t have time to admire the battle prowess of our allies. Someone stepped directly under my horse’s nose. The beast skittered to the side, and I was thrown to the ground. I scrambled to my feet, sword in hand, as the man charged me. Too slow. I couldn’t get my sword up in time to block him.

Someone shouted, “Down!”

I hit the ground as Konstantin’s ax slashed the air above my head.

Hot blood spurted down on me. Konstantin yanked the ax from the body and offered me a hand up.

The big man grinned. “Careful there, Captain. Almost went home a head shorter.”

I opened my mouth to answer, but a spurt of hot metallic wetness choked me. Konstantin blinked down at the ax embedded in his chest.

I reacted without thinking. I drove my sword through the attacker’s neck, kicking the man down as I took the sword back. Konstantin swayed on his feet, and I grabbed him before he could fall.

“I’ve got you. Healer!” I half-dragged him back to the sleighs, out of the fighting.

“Han?” His voice was weak.

“I’m here. I’ve got you,” I said again. “Healer!” I roared.

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