Page 19 of Fear Me, Love Me

I’m the problem.

Everyone knows messed-up people snap together like magnets. My mess is sad girl shit. Tyrant’s mess is intestines and bullets. He’s feeding on my vulnerabilities, but he didn’t cause them. He’s the only good thing that my damage has given me. The rest has been blood, pain, tears, and loneliness. My mess has given me a beautiful man who holds me down and fucks me hard, and I’m supposed to be a good girl and open my arms to suffering instead of to him?

The man wants a baby. Maybe I should give him one.

“Wicked child,” I whisper to myself, climbing the stairs to my dorm room and shaking my head. Everyone knows you’re not supposed to surrender to the bad guy even one little bit. “Wicked, wicked child.”

I get out my sketchbook and sit cross-legged on the floor. In pencil, I sketch the figure of a girl who resembles me, only she has a swollen, pregnant belly and bigger breasts. She has her hand on her belly.

The drawing looks good, but it’s not perfect. It’s missing something I’ve been daydreaming about, and I add another, larger hand over the girl’s. A masculine, tattooed hand.

I stare at the drawing for a few minutes, and then throw it aside and scrub my hands over my face. What would make me feel better is getting out my little box and scoring a few cuts into my flesh. As I think about the blades, I feel the ghost of a strong, tattooed hand around my throat, and it’s squeezing hard. Tyrant wouldn’t like finding fresh cuts on my body. The only blood I’m supposed to shed is for him. I imagine him forcing the pointed end of a knife beneath my jaw as he unzips his fly, growling at me to hold fucking still or he’ll slit my throat. Wetness and heat surge between my legs. My fingers slip over my stomach and curl around my inner thigh, before slipping into my underwear. I moan and writhe against my fingers.

It doesn’t take long for me to get there, but the climax feels empty and so do I. The most frustrating part is I know exactly who I’m missing, and he doesn’t only leave me satisfied, he pushes me over a terrifying precipice and then holds me safe in his strong arms.

Tyrant’s not here, so I crawl into bed, pull the blankets over my head, and close my eyes.

In my sleep, I’m vaguely aware of the sensation of something being forced inside me. Something thick that stretches me, and I moan softly as my dreaming brain shows me Tyrant braced above me in my mind’s eye. The dangerous man who stalks me is fucking me so carefully in my dreams.

Tyrant pulls back and thrusts deeper, jolting my body. It feels so vivid. The pleasure-pain is so sharp and sweet.

This is a dream, right? I rise up through layers of sleep, my eyelashes fluttering. I’m paralyzed by my sleepy brain and the heavy heat and weight on my body.

A deep, husky voice murmurs somewhere over my head, “Shh. Go back to sleep, angel. It’s just a dream.”

I’m only dreaming that Tyrant’s thick cock is pumping in and out of me. Filling me to stretching and then easing back again. It must be because I fell asleep masturbating to him. My eyes settle closed, and I drift off again. Dream Tyrant feels so good that my breathing grows heavy and an aching pleasure fills my body.

I move my jaw but I can’t open my mouth. There’s something gagging me. When I squirm a little, trying to pull the sheet or whatever it is away from my mouth, I find I can’t because my hands are pinned behind my back.

There’s heavy panting over my head. “Oh, fuck yes, angel. So tight. Such a good girl.”

I drag my eyes open, but I can’t tell if I’m still dreaming or not because it’s so dark. I try to say,Tyrant?but it comes out as, “Mm-mm?”

“I couldn’t wait until you were awake. I saw this pussy, and I had to start fucking you.” Tyrant groans as he works his cock deeper, and then he gives a soft, malicious laugh. “After I pulled your clothes off. And gagged you. And tied you up. With so many people in this building, I couldn’t have you screaming. Everyone might run to help you before I’ve finished with you.”

I squirm against my bonds. Rub my cheek against the pillow to get the gag out of my mouth. It doesn’t work, and I can’t move. I’m pinned on my stomach with my thighs spread. Tyrant’s knees are between my thighs, forcing me wider as he drives his cock into me. His hands are on either side of my head, and my body sinks deeper and deeper into the mattress with every thrust.

His breathing is getting harder, and he seethes in my ear, “You’re so pretty, my helpless little slut. All tied up and taking my cock.”

Pleasure shoots through me at his degrading words, and I melt into the mattress.

Use me. Make me feel like there’s a point to my existence, even if it’s just as a hole for you to fuck. My window is open, and a fresh wind is blowing inside. Tyrant must have climbed the tree and broken in through the window. There’s CCTV everywhere around the building. The man really is crazy.

My body melts into the ropes binding me. The gag between my teeth feels like it lives there. My eyes grow heavy lidded.

Tyrant groans under his breath as he feels my body surrender. He fists his hand in my hair and holds it brutally tight. “That’s it, angel. Just relax and let me breed you. I’m going to shoot my load so deep inside you and keep it there.”

I forgot to try and get another Plan B pill, and Tyrant’s about to come inside me yet again. When I squirm and struggle, he only fucks me harder.

“Still fighting me on this? You’re not going anywhere. You’re going to lie there and take my cock and think about how much better your life is going to be when you belong to me, totally and utterly. I’ve been merciful until now, Vivienne, and you haven’t even thanked me. Now I’m done. Being.Merciful.” He emphasizes these words with vicious thrusts of his cock.

Merciful? He calls turning my life upside down merciful? My life was quiet before he invaded my home and stole Barlow away. Now it’s chaotic, and I’m sinking deeper and deeper into the chaos with every stroke of his thick shaft. My core is blazing with pleasure around him. I’m tightening and tightening on his length and when he feels it, he utters a victorious groan.

“You love it when I’m cruel to you, angel,” he seethes in my ear. “You love me controlling every little thing about your life. I’m the only one who can protect you. I’m the only one who gives a damn about you. Feel my cock? Feel those ropes? You’re so fucking protected.”

Tyrant forces my knees wider and his cock deeper, and I shatter around him.

As I climax, he hammers into me faster and harder than ever, making the bed shake and thud against the wall. Tyrant doesn’t seem to give a damn about being heard now. He comes with a brutal thrust of his cock and a snarled curse.

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