Page 115 of Crowned

I stare at him as he disappears out the door. Now that I think of it, I haven’t seen him with bloodshot eyes and a sweaty brow in a very long time, and some days he has Viktoria screaming directly into his ear. She’s very vocal when she’s not happy about something.

“How the hell did that happen?” I wonder out loud.

Elyah is laying comfortably against the pillows with his arm around my waist and his eyes closed, and he murmurs, “He is happy,solnyshko.”

“Being happy doesn’t cure a bullet in the brain.”

Kirill pushes his hands through his curls. “The bullet didn’t even crack his skull. The migraines were…psycho-whatsit. I don’t know the English word.”

“Psychosomatic?”

“That’s it.”

I cuddle up in between my two men, thinking about it. It’s an interesting theory, that Konstantin’s headaches were a physical manifestation of all his unresolved hurt and anger about his past.

It’s so warm and comfortable here between Elyah and Kirill. A moment later, Konstantin comes back with Viktoria in his arms, and she’s miraculously smiling now that Daddy has come to get her. She’s dressed in a onesie with elephants that bring out the gray tones in her eyes. Her hair has turned blonde, and I wonder if she’ll take after me or if it will darken in time like her father’s.

“I’m so happy about your migraines,” I whisper, my cheek pillowed on Kirill’s chest.

Konstantin sinks down on the bed next to us, and Kirill reaches out to Viktoria, who wraps her chubby hand around his forefinger.

“Have you decided what you want to do about what we all talked about?” Konstantin asks.

He means about the question they asked me a few weeks ago. Will I marry one of them? Officially. Legally. They all said that they wanted to be the man, but it’s up to me.

Konstantin is very traditional, and I can tell he wants me to pick him. It’s been his aim all along to marry.

Elyah pretends that he doesn’t mind who I choose, but I can see the longing in his eyes.

Kirill is harder to read, and I can’t tell if he’s joking or serious about wanting to marry me.

“It’s so hard to choose one of you. I don’t want to disturb what we have when we…” I struggle for the right way to describe it. “Fit so well together.”

“Don’t we,” murmurs Elyah, kissing my neck, and I can tell from the amusement in his voice that he’s thinking about what we just did.

Konstantin’s warm hand smooths my hair, and my mind drifts over my current jewelry designs as Viktoria babbles sweetly.

My eyes pop open. “I’ve got it.”

But can I really do it? It’s way beyond any of my skills. But someone could do it if I described what I wanted…

I sit up and extricate myself from the pile of warm bodies, give them all a kiss, including Viktoria, and hurry out of the room.

Wrapped in a silk robe with my bed hair tumbling around my head, I run into my workshop and snatch the sketchbook off the desk, flipping to a fresh page.

It takes a week to get it right, ripping my drafts from the book and balling them up in frustration. I’m still learning to draw and design, but it has to be perfect because it’sus.

Finally, I send them all a text and ask them to come to my workroom.

When they’re all gathered by my desk, Elyah asks, “Have you made your decision?”

“I’ve decided.” I smile at them all, breathless with anticipation. “I’m not going to marry any of you.”

They stare at me blankly.

I hurry on. “Or rather, I’m going to marry all of you. In a way. Here, look at this.”

I open my sketchbook and show them a design. A wedding band made up of three rings that fit together, which is exactly how I feel when I’m with them.

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