“But he wants to marry you?” Leona asks. “Of course, he does. Who wouldn’t? I’d marry you.” She blushes.
“Niko is not subject to my magic the way you are, Leona. Yes, he wants to marry me. At least, he did.” My chest hurts and my eyes fill again.
“Don’t cry anymore, Astra. What happened?” Cade’s command is gentle but effective.
I wipe my eyes and tell them about the deal I made with Niko and about my father showing up at his house.
They both stare with mouths agape. Cade speaks first. “Niko took the full blow of Nocturn’s magic to save you.”
I nod.
“Would that kill him?” Leona grips her mug with white knuckles.
“I don’t know what Father’s intentions were for me. I saw Niko fall and I ran. If he survives, he’ll hate me for running like a coward. I thought Father would chase me.” I down the remainder of my spiked tea. “I’m no good for him. Just like my father, I have no ability to love.”
Cade wraps an arm around Leona’s waist. “Why are you crying if you don’t care about Niko?”
How dare he. “Of course, Icare. Not wishing death or magical enslavement on someone is not the same as being able to love them.”
“That’s true.” Leona puts her mug down and leans forward. “Why did you run?”
“I thought my father would be distracted, run out of Niko’s house, and leave him alone. If I could have lured Father away, then Niko might have been strong enough to withstand one blow. Besides it’s unlikely Father wanted to kill me. He probably would have bespelled me and forced me to marry tomorrow.”
“Can he do that?” Leona’s eyes are wide.
I nod. “He’s a demigod. He could have done so before, but he thought to trick me instead. Maybe it was part of the terms of his wager with Prede.”
Gape-mouthed, Leona blinks several times. “There was a wager about your marriage?”
Cade holds up a hand to pause whatever else his woman was about to say. “Let’s come back to your father’s behavior later. We already know the nature of demigods is to toy with the lives of others for amusement. When you ran out of the house, you wanted to protect Niko. Did you enjoy your time with him?”
“Yes. He is kind and we had fun.” I don’t say that his music soothes me, his hands calm me, his cooking nourishes me, or that his body fits mine perfectly.
“Maybe you just wanted to have a good time and then go on your way to find the wyvern you were rushing to when we saw you last. Niko was a fling.” Leona leans against Cade’s chest and wraps her arms around his neck.
A rush of longing sweeps over me. I want what these two have found, a sense of belonging and being a part of something special. “No. It wasn’t meaningless.”
“Do you miss him?” Cade nuzzles Leona’s hair.
“I’ve only been away from him an hour.” A knot tightens in my gut and my chest feels hollow.
“Then you know he’s not dead?” Cade stares at me.
Leona smiles. “Do you sense him the way Cade senses me?”
Closing my eyes, I search the world and instantly, Niko is there. “He’s alive. I feel him.” I sit up straight. “I feel him. Why can I feel him from this distance?”
“Maybe he’s your true mate.” Leona sighs.
I shake my head. “Nymphs don’t mate for life.”
“Satyrs do.” Cade runs his finger along Leona’s upper arm.
I stand and walk to the window. A shiver runs up my back and gooseflesh pops out on my arms. “I know nothing of love or mates. I have lived my entire life under the thumb of my father, and he does not love me.”
“You love your trees and the lakes here.” Cade leans back and Leona snuggles against his chest.
“That’s different. They are a part of me and care for me but cannot love, nor can I.” These damned tears keep coming and I brush them away. I pace back toward my friend. “Explain love.”