Page 84 of Crossed Sticks

His face fell, and he seemed about to cry. Instead, he rallied and spoke in a soft, compassionate voice. “Please tell me what happened with Harper that got you so much more upset.”

I let Caleb’s hand go and told the story as simply as I could. He didn’t interrupt, then remained quiet after I finished. After a while, he patted my leg. “It hurts my heart to hear that and see how it’s affected you. Why don’t you call him now?”

“I can’t. He’s at training camp, and I’m sure they don’t have their phones with them on the ice.”

“You can leave a voicemail. Or message him now and call later.”

I shook my head. “I don’t want him to know where I am.”

“I could see how much he cares about you, Luki. He won’t judge you for getting help, but if he did, he wouldn’t deserve to be in your life.”

“It isn’t your place to say who gets to be in my life.”

I’d spoken more harshly than I intended to, and Caleb shook his head. “I didn’t mean that. Only that Harper cares about you, and I’d be very surprised if he didn’t support you however he could. I know everything’s messed up, but it can take something like this to help people realize what’s truly important.”

“If he’s iffy about wanting to be with me, I don’t need him thinking I’m mentally unbalanced.”

“You’re not unbalanced.”

“And how’s he supposed to know that from hundreds of miles away?”

“Give him a chance, Luca.”

In a flash, I knew what I should do. “I’ll give usbotha chance. I’ll check myself out of here, go home, and call him from there.”

Caleb scoffed. “And conveniently omit telling him you became seriously ill while you were waiting for him to come back? That you’ve been in the hospital for depression? You can’t lie to him about this without chasing him away for sure.”

“I’ll tell him once we get back on an even keel.”

A nurse appeared in the alcove’s entrance holding a stack of folders. “Is everything okay? I heard raised voices.”

“It’s fine,” I said. “We’re discussing alternatives. Since you’re here, how do I check myself out?”

She furrowed her brow. “Did Dr. Putnam say you’re ready to leave?”

“I didn’t ask. I’ll leave without her okay.”

The nurse shook her head. “You can’t. Two doctors in the ER ordered you moved up here.”

“That’s not true. They suggested I come up here, and I agreed. I couldn’t possibly have misunderstood that.”

“I’m afraid you’ll have to sort it out with Dr. Putnam.”

“I’m here voluntarily, so I can leave whenever I want.”

The nurse set the folders down on a table, pulled one out, and opened it. “This is your chart. I was just reviewing it, and it plainly says you were placed here by two of the doctors in the ER. See?” She held it out, pointing to a line that said I was here under doctor’s orders.

Anger erupted inside me, and I had to work hard to push it down. “That’s wrong. Dr. Putnam knows.”

“If you’re right, she’s the only one who can fix it. Until then, under state law, you can’t leave until you’re cleared by either her or a judge. And whether you’re here voluntarily or not, you only leave between ten a.m. and three p.m. Talk to Dr. Putnam in the morning, and if she agrees you can go, you’ll be able to do it then.”

“Fine.” Fighting with the hospital would use the energy I’d need to convince Harper to see things my way. If I had to stay here one more night, so be it. I turned back to Caleb. “I’ll leave in the morning.”

“You ass. I swear, you are your own worst enemy.Pleasedon’t do this. Stay here until you’re better, and don’t lie toHarper. If you’ve ever believed anything I said, believe me now. Your relationship will not survive if you lie to him about this, even by omission.”

Caleb’s serious expression gave me pause. If something like this happened to Harp and he delayed telling me, it would be hard to take. I ran a nervous hand through my hair and tried to keep my voice even. “Why do you think you know everything? If it weren’t for you, Harp and I would be fine. You had to force your way in and ruin everything.”

Caleb’s eyes brimmed with tears, but I could tell he was trying to hold them back. “I’m sorry.”

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