Page 149 of That First Flight

“No,” Macey stops me. “It’s because ofyou.”

I shake my head. “Don’t you see, babe? You’re the one who decided to get on that flight and start a new life for you two. You’re the one who decided to get in the car with a complete stranger who lives off of takeout and Pop-Tarts.” She laughs at that. “You’re the one who trusted me enough to live in my apartment so thatyoucould make it happen. Macey. Baby. That’s all you.”

“I…” She stops herself as tears stream down her face.

Tell me you feel it too.

“Thank you,” Macey settles on. “I-I don’t know what we would do without you and I don’t think I want to find out.”

“You won’t ever have to find out if I have anything to do with it.”

I lean in and kiss her.

Sealing every single unspoken word with our lips.

I groan as I roll over in bed but it feels different.

My eyes snap open and I immediately notice that I’m not in my room, I’m in Oliver’s. I don’t sit up in a panic. Instead I find myself nestling a little tighter into his pillow. I attempt to try and find his scent, but all I smell is whatever lavender body wash and shampoo he used on me last night.

Thoughts of the night before come rushing to the front of my brain, and my stomach stings with the pain of my parents' words again.

Out of everything they’ve ever said to me, I can’t get those two sentences out of my head.

You’ve never been fit to be a mother. I will make sure she comes home where she belongs.

The old me would have spiraled into the dark place I haven’t seen in a while.

The old me would have probably agreed with the dark thoughts and said they were right.

But what they said is so far from the truth and all it took was a verbal smack to reality with Oliver's words last night. I can’t think of a single time I’ve seen him angry. I don’t think I want to see it again, but it made me understand so much more about myself.

My throat feels so dry and I can’t help but choke as I let out a cough likely due to crying so much last night that I depleted my body of any form of liquid it needs to survive.

Just as I’m about to get out of bed, the door swings open and Oliver stands there with a tall glass of water.Lookinglike a tall glass of water. His sweatpants sit low on his waist and he has no shirt on to cover his insane muscles I want to run my hands over.

Relax, Macey.

“Good morning,” Oliver says, his voice deep and sleepy.

“I’m sorry, did I wake you?” I ask.

“No. I was laying on the couch waiting for you to wake up.”

My eyebrows narrow as I sit up taller. “You slept on the couch?”

He nods. “I didn’t want us both to be in here if Mackenzie woke up early. I didn’t want her to think anything.”

Right. That.

I’m so done with being in the dark with Oliver. I want to bring us to the light. I want to share this with Mackenzie and see how she feels. I want to see what we could possibly be.

“I want to talk to her today. If that’s okay with you.”

“She was worried last night about you,” Oliver says.

My chest tightens realizing that she probably saw me emotionally drained last night and I didn’t tell her that her grandparents showed up. I know I need to tell her that too.

“I’m going to talk to her about it. And”—I pause, assessing his features—“us.”