Page 46 of Heartbreak Hill

“Me neither.” Nadia paused. “I’m in a bind, Hazel. I don’t know what to do.”

“What’s wrong?”

“I don’t have anyone to pick the girls up or stay with them until I get home. Any after-school activities don’t start for another couple of weeks.”

“I’ll get them,” she said without hesitation.

“How? You have to work.”

“I can work from home in the afternoons,” she told Nadia. “I wasn’t going to because Lord knows I’ll never get any work done with Hayden yammering in my ear, but I can do this for you.”

“Are you sure?”

“Without a doubt. I’ll stop by in the morning and pick up your extra key. I’m assuming you’re taking them to school?”

“Yeah, as much as I don’t want to. I have to. It’s going to be hard.”

“We’ll go together. A team effort. Besides, Hayden misses Lynnea, and it’ll be good for the girls to be together.”

“You’re right. Thank you.”

“You’d do the same for me,” Hazel said.

“I pray you never have to go through what I’m going through.”

Hazel didn’t respond. She didn’t need to. Nadia knew what her friend would say—Me too.

“I’ll see you in the morning. Try to get some sleep, Nadia. You’re teaching middle schoolers tomorrow, and you need to be quick on your toes.”

After they hung up, Nadia felt a smidge better. She still didn’t want to go to work, leave the house every day, or have the kids out of her sight. She welcomed the day when she’d be better, when missing Rafe was easier and her life made sense again.

The next morning, she woke up well before Gemma and Lynnea had to be out of bed, determined to start fresh. She showered, dressed, and avoided everything in her room that reminded her of her husband. In the kitchen, she fixed the batter for pancakes, poured orange juice into cups, and set the table. Nadia hummed a song she’d heard but wasn’t sure of the words or the title. She wasn’t even sure where she’d heard it.

Nadia piled three pancakes on her spatula and turned. The girls weren’t at the table, nor could she hear them upstairs. The pancakes fellto the floor, and tears welled behind her eyes. She had forgotten to wake them up, and judging by the numbers on the stove clock, they’d be late.

Everything in her screamed to go back to bed, to call out sick, to keep the girls home because they weren’t ready to return. How would she survive if she couldn’t get them up on time?

She wouldn’t, unless she tried. Trying was as hard as living these days.

Leaving the pancakes on the floor, she made her way upstairs, working to clear her thoughts and feelings on the already chaotic morning. Tonight, she’d order Gemma an alarm clock and ask her to please help her with Lynnea. It was the best Nadia could do.

“Gemma,” Nadia said as she went into her room. She turned her light on and found her daughter awake and staring at her. “How long have you been up?”

She shrugged. “A while.”

Anger surged inside of Nadia, rising to an instant headache. She knew she shouldn’t be upset. Gemma was only eight, but irritation baited her, causing her to feel emotions she never wanted to.

“Get out of bed and help me with your sister. We’re going to be late.” She left Gemma’s room and went into Lynnea’s, pushing the door open abruptly. Lynnea startled and rubbed her eyes.

“You need to get up. We’re late.” Nadia looked for the clothes she’d laid out the night before, remembering specifically that she’d left them on the chair. “Where are your clothes?”

“I don’t like them.”

“I don’t care, Lynnea. Where are they?”

Lynnea said nothing and started to cry.

Gemma was her morning girl. The one who woke up with a smile on her face and was ready to take on the world. Lynnea, not so much. She was a grumpy sunshine who wanted to be held and needed time to wake up before the demands of the day took their turn.

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