Page 54 of Alpha Varsity

Except I already see the brick wall I’m speeding toward. A huge, horrible crash is inevitable for me. And I don’t even know which of the looming walls on all sides I hope to hit. All I can wish for is that it doesn’t destroy me entirely.

Chapter Sixteen

Asher

Once more, I’m shaken by Lotta’s tears, and my teammates take the brunt of it.

Coach Jamison blows the whistle at me when I knock Seb ten feet into the air.

Why was she crying? Last time I was sure it wasn’t something I’d done. I gave her what she needed, she just didn’twantto need it.

This time, though, a terrible niggling feeling tells me it’s because I’ve been a bastard to her. Is it possible she does care how I feel about her?

That it hurts her when I’m cruel?

I somehow thought the tiny half-pint of authority didn’t give a fuck about me or the fact that I hate her. I thought she didn’t give a fuck about what she’d done because she left town without an explanation. She stayed away for over four years.

Here I’ve been relentlessly punishing her and not believing it had any effect.

Seb is usually laid-back, but he doesn’tappreciate landing on his back from such a height. He jumps up with a growl and tries to tackle me. I plow into him at the same time, and our bodies collide with a loud crack.

“Dude, what’s your problem?”

I roll my shoulders under the pads and snap my head to make my neck crack. “Nothing. Sorry, man.”

After practice, I shower. Knowing Lotta’s in the building makes showering with the guys insufferable. I have to force myself not to think of her. Not to remember that she’s close by. That I could easily pick up that tight little body of hers, pin her against a wall, and show her how much agony she puts me in.

Today, the thought of those tears keeps me from getting a hard-on while I shower.

Remembering the salty scent agitates me. The need to fix whatever is bothering her eats at me.

I take my time toweling off and packing up my bag to leave. Then I sit and pull out my phone, staring at the screen, trying to formulate a plan.

“You need to talk, Asher?” Coach Jamison startles me from my reverie. He’s leaning against the lockers, looking at me.

“Oh, uh, no Coach.”

“She-wolf problems?”

“Ah, not really. Well, yeah. Kind of.”

Coach grins. “Which is it?”

“I don’t know. They’re confusing, right?”

He chuckles. “They are certainly more complicated than we are. Sounds like you need a date night. To connect with your girl away from school and pack, so you can get to know each other as people. Have you done that yet?”

I try to push the image of me banging Lotta on all fours in the middle of that king-sized bed of hers last night.

“Uh no. That’s a good idea, Coach.”

I stand and sling my bag over my shoulder and look back at the screen of my phone. Maybe Coach is right. A conventional date isn’t possible, but changing things up couldn’t be a bad thing. An idea starts to form in my mind as I walk out of the building, and I send a text to Lotta.

Meet me at the old blinking light at six. I’ll bring dinner.

Lotta

The “old blinking light” is now actually a regular stoplight, but it used to be a blinking red light at the crossroads between town and the mountain passes. A four-way stop sign between highways.