Page 71 of Solitude

I’d never tell him, but I guess he’s right.

Sunlight streams in through the window behind my bed, and I roll onto my back, stretching my arms above my head and yelp when I open my eyes and find Beck staring down at me, wide eyed with a furrowed brow. His blue eyes swirl, and I can practically see the way his brain is turning a million miles a minute.

“I’m scared.”

He says it openly, honest as always, like being vulnerable with me is the easiest thing in the world. He’s not trying to hide his emotions behind a mask, forcing me to guess what he’s thinking, and that’s one of the things I love about Beck.

He doesn’t make me guess. He doesn’t let me have a chance to make assumptions.

So I run my hand over his cheek softly. “Scared of what, B?”

That was new. The nickname. If you can even call it a nickname considering it was just a letter. It slipped out one afternoon about a month ago when we were laughing on the phone, and I could tell he enjoyed having something that only I called him. He was Beck to everyone, even to me. He always would be. But now he’s more than Beck, my longtime crush.

Now, he’s B, my husband and father of the baby in my womb.

“I’m going to miss all of it,” he tells me, flopping onto his back beside me, and my heart aches for him.

He’s right though. If he’s in Los Angeles, he’s going to miss so much. Of our first year of marriage and of our child’s life.

Swallowing, I turn my head to look at him. “I’ll come to LA with you then.”

He huffs, a dry, humorless laugh tumbling out of him, and he looks at me. His blue eyes are soft as his hand finds mine and squeezes. “No.”

“No? You don’t want me to come with you?”

He shakes his head, hair sticking up wildly. “I don’t.”

My face drops, disappointment shining in my eyes.

“Don’t look at me like that,” he grins, sitting up and pulling me with him. He cups my scowling face. “You’ll be miserable in LA, Winnie. You know it. I know it.”

“But—”

“No buts,” he shakes his head. He kisses the tip of my nose. “I love you enough to tell you no right now. We’ll make it work. I’m just going to complain a lot.”

“I’ll be miserable here without you, too.”

“It’s like you love me or something.”

I pinch him.

“Ow! Hey! That’s not the way you’re supposed to treat your husband.”

“Then maybe my husband should stop teasing me.”

Beck grins, lopsided and gorgeous. Those dimples indenting his cheeks and making me melt. “Say it again.”

“Myhusband.”

A growl leaves Beck’s mouth as he tackles me against the mattress and presses his lips firmly to mine, swallowing my giggles that turn into gasps as I cling to him. My arms twine around his neck, pulling him closer and closer until it’s clear that even crawling inside of him wouldn’t be close enough.

Bang! Bang!

“Better put some clothes on in there!”

Beck jerks away and flicks a concerned look my way before sliding off the bed.

“Hold on!” I call out, stumbling out of bed and shoving my legs into the first pair of sweat pants I can find before making my way to the front door of the guesthouse.

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