Page 53 of Solitude

“Okay,” I mumble, smile growing as his own does.

He pushes at my shoulder until I’m on my back, his body hovering over mine as he gazes down at me. He’s on his side, arm laying lightly across my stomach, fingers splayedover my waist. The heat of his hand burns through the thin material of my shirt, and I swallow thickly, unsure what to do with my own hands as heat pools in my lower belly.

“Beck?” I whisper hoarsely.

He doesn’t say anything. Just lowers his head until his lips are pressing against mine, tongue licking along the seam of my mouth until I open for him. His tongue slips into my mouth, licks over my teeth and caresses my tongue until my hands are lifting to card through his hair. A noise I’ve never made before tumbles out of me as Beck squeezes my waist, and my hips lift of their own accord.

My hip brushes along the front of Beck’s athletic shorts, and I gasp into his mouth.

Beck breaks the kiss and drops his head to rest on my shoulder, breathing heavily as his fingers tighten minutely on my waist again.

I rake my fingers through his tousled hair, my heart racing.

“I’m going to miss you, Winnie.”

Lifting his head, I cup his face and press a kiss to his lips. “Yeah?”

Beck nods, eyes dipping down to my mouth before meeting my amber eyes once more. “I don’t know what we’re doing here. I don’t really even need to define it because…it doesn’t matter in the end. I just don’t want to leave without you knowing how I feel.”

“I feel the same way, Beck,” I confess finally. He deserves it after spilling his guts in the park and being so honestwith me this whole time. “All of it. Even if it’s too fast.”

He huffs out an airy laugh. “Can I say something scary?”

“You’ve already said a lot of scary things.”

“Just one more?”

I soften, my fingers raking through his hair again as I try not to show him how affected by him. “Just one. Then we need to get you packed.”

He inhales and exhales, blue eyes dark and serious. “I think you’re it for me. I’ve always heard people say ‘when you know, you know’ and… I just know with you, Winnie.”

“Beck,” I breathe.

“You don’t have to say anyth?—”

I cut him off by pulling his face down to mine, kissing him squarely on the mouth to shut him up. Because, while I might be scared to get my hopes up right now, every word that leaves his mouth is making me want to suggest we run off to Vegas and get married by drunk Elvis.

And that would be more absurd than anything we’ve said tonight.

4

APRIL ‘24

Winnie

My nerves are shotby the time I’m rolling my suitcase through the crowded airport, eyes scanning the people zigzagging around wildly.

I need a shower and a nap after the day I’ve had.

All of my problems started before I ever left Magnolia Hollow.

It’s strange being homeless right now. I guess I’m not technically homeless as Beth has so graciously let me stay in the guest house on Bluebird Ranch, but it’s not home. It’s not mine. It’s nice, nicer than living with my parents has ever been, but it’s still not home.

Maybe it’ll feel like it one day.

I wish I could say I was shocked when my parents kicked me out of the house. I was more shocked that it took so long for it to happen. I figured Lorelai would kick me to thecurb as soon as she found those rejection letters, truthfully, but she didn’t. Every day, I walked on eggshells in that house wondering when the final shoe was going to drop.

And, buddy, it finally did.

---