"So she's switching," Saul adds. "Perhaps it's hard for her to come to terms with her new life. It could be a dissociation technique her mind does to her to keep her unharmed."

"You might have a fucking point," I hiss. "But I don't want two versions of Tallulah. I want all of her. I want her to be fully herself when she's with me."

"I understand." Saul grimaces. "Unfortunately,padron, we have more issues to deal with on top of that."

I exhale and nod. "Alright, tell me what's been going on."

"The Scorpion cartel is becoming a bigger problem than we initially thought," murmurs my right-hand man. "And many of us can't understand why you're not treating this as a problem at all."

"I've told you before," I grind out, "this has nothing to do with any of you and everything to do with me and my brother."

"Your brother sure is stirring up a lot of trouble for our men," Saul says, resting his head in his palms. "It's not just me who's worried; Julio and even Phoenix have been making unsettling comments."

"Julio?" I let off an amused laugh. "So we're listening to the words of a barely initiated Hitman now? You should know better than that, Saul. He's nothing but a sicario. You've done plenty toantagonize him. You can't expect loyalty if you don't give them a reason to follow."

"I can't," I laugh bitterly. "Do you really think I'm so weak that these men wouldn't pledge their allegiance for life? I've never had a problem with that, as you may have noticed. I don't appreciate being questioned about it now.”

"I'm just telling you that the entire cartel is having real trouble believing you're on top of this. The constant threats against Tallulah, her father's questioning of you—is that supposed to be news?" I say, cocking an eyebrow. "We both know that little prick never appreciated me and what I did for him."

Saul raises his brows, staring at me in silent defiance. We both acknowledge the horror I inflicted on Heath and the doubt creeping in about the rights I had as his guardian to subject him to such darkness. It's disconcerting that Heath is still reeling from the aftermath of my actions. What's more disconcerting is my lack of remorse for what I did to my nephew, particularly since his daughter, Tallulah, awakens my conscience in a way nobody else does.

"You should know, Padron, Tallulah's parents have been bombarding us with questions about their daughter," Saul says. "And this is my problem how?" I sneer. "This is what I have you people for—to deal with these issues instead of me."

"I'm just saying, Xavier," Saul says in a low, threatening tone, "many of us are getting tired of this. You might soon face a mutiny."

"Are you trying to threaten me?" I ask. "That's laughable. Now get out of my office." He stands and shakes his head. "Have you noticed how common this occurrence has been since Tallulah came to live with you?" he remarks. "I can count how many times I've been thrown out of your office in the past 20 years on one hand. But if we add up the last two years, that number will be a lot higher. I can't help but think it's because of her."

"You should keep your nose out of what doesn't concern you," I hiss. "Now get the hell out. I won't let anyone question my relationship with my wife. Leave!"

Chapter Five

Tallulah

Iwas raised bymy parents to be a cruel, cold-hearted assassin. And now, I've disappointed them fully by marrying the man I was supposed to kill. I wonder if they'll ever forgive me, but I've realized I don't need their forgiveness. I forgive myself for falling in love with a monster because that monster changed my life and made it so much better.

I hear Matilda giggling as she explores the drawers in the foyer, while Hades and Zeus patiently wait for their turn for some yummy treats. An awkward silence falls over the room, and I quickly realize my parents are waiting for me to speak. However, I have nothing to say. All the insults and nasty things I've wanted to express to them over the years die a silent death on my lips. I can't bring myself to utter a word, and we just stare awkwardly at one another as we wait for Matilda to return.

Xavier promised he wouldn't be here for this meeting, but now I'm almost wishing for my husband to be by my side. Hisheavy palm against my shoulder would make it so much easier, comforting me.

Is that everything I want right now? Silently, I make contact with the camera positioned in the corner of the room, wordlessly signaling Xavier to come into the sunroom and put an end to this.

However, he thought it was important for me to see my family, and I didn't want to argue with him. I've let him down too many times already. All I want now is to be a good girl, as challenging as it is with my whole family around. My husband certainly didn't approve of my outfit, which is a sky blue simple dress with long sleeves and a modest hemline.

I'm certain that Xavier would prefer to dress me in something revealing and sensual, but there will be a time for that later. Before Matilda returns to the room, my mother sighs heavily and faces me for the first time. I can tell she's about to say something I probably won't appreciate, but I want her to have the chance to do so.

"Go on," I say in a neutral tone, indicating that she can tell me anything.

My father lets out a snort, and I glare at him. He always acts so self-righteous, as if he wasn't exactly the same way with my mom. He caged and imprisoned her, much like my husband did to me. After all, it's the tradition in the cartel. None of these marriages are exactly willing, at least not from the bride's perspective. Yet I can't bring myself to hate them. A small part of me wishes it had died years ago, but it's still desperate for my parents' approval, something I'm constantly searching for but always come up empty.

"We love you very much, Tallulah," my mother says softly. "That's why we're concerned."

"You're concerned?" I ask, mocking her tone. "Well, there's a first time for anything, isn't there? You sure as hell weren't concerned before."

"Stop making this worse," Mom mutters.

"Oh, what a martyr you are. That's a role you play very well, Mother," I say, my words dripping with venom. "And what do you have to say for yourself?"

I turn to face my father, his impenetrable gaze locked with mine, challenging me in a silent battle of wits. "Do you have something to say? I bet it's nothing I haven't heard before. It's just going to be another barrage of you saying how disappointed you are with me, how much I've let you down, like I always do. Isn’t that right, Dad?"