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Without hesitating, he lifted me into his arms, cradling me as if he had just rescued me from a fire. My head rested on his shoulder as he climbed the stairs and kicked open the gate I kept at the top.

“I’ll fix that.”

When he laid me down on the bed, I thought for sure he was going to tear my clothes off. But he hesitated, hovering over me, our eyes staying locked. His breathing was erratic, as if he was holding himself back from chaos.

“You’re gonna break my heart,” he whispered matter of factly, then leaned down and kissed me. Not giving me the chance to tell him how impossible that felt when it was clear I was too busy breaking my own.

Chapter Thirty-Six

EASTON

Sendingme a text on a random Thursday afternoon asking me to come over so we could talk was a dead giveaway that it wasn’t going to be good. She was ready to try her big escape, away from what we had and what I knew we could be. But from the moment I got there, she was shaking and breathless. It was hard to resist kissing her and touching her when we both so clearly needed one another.

As I walked her up the stairs, it felt like it could very well be the last time. That no matter how perfect we were, and how much I insisted I’d wait for her, she’d still be too scared and adamant to change her mind. I didn’t know shit about being a parent, but I knew that if she thought not being with me was best for Max, then it was a decision she’d make regardless of either of our hearts.

I loved her even more for that.

“You’re gonna break my heart,” I whispered. But I didn’t give her a chance to refute. It’d have been a wasted breath and if Ionly had one more chance to make her breathless, it wouldn’t be spent disputing our feelings.

Taking one finger, I traced between her breasts, pulling the top of her dress down. Her nipples hardened as soon as they were exposed to the cool air of the room, and I moved my mouth down to cover one and then the other. Fingers ran through my hair and she pushed on the back of my head, making me suck harder.

My cock was throbbing, my jeans were uncomfortable, and sweat had started to form over my entire body. When I lifted my head and looked into her eyes, she could tell I was having a hard time controlling myself. I intended to go slow, but my body needed to be inside of her as soon as possible.

When she reached down, she cupped my cock through my jeans and her legs spread open. It only took a few rough squeezes and I felt spineless again. So weak that I couldn’t stop myself from pulling the dress off her body and throwing my clothes around her room.

Climbing over top of her, I pushed my cock against her core, finding that soft opening, where the wetness from her pussy pulled me in and warmed meup. It was all I could do to tease her, tempt her. Make her needy with anticipation.

Once I was inside of her, though, I felt at ease, like I was home, right where I belonged. It didn’t keep the urgency at bay, but it did remind me that I needed to savor the feeling.

Slowly, I pulled out and then pushed back in, watching intently as her eyes widened and her lips quivered. Every few thrusts, I’d kiss her, passionately and with intent. To show her that us making love should last forever. That we should always be connected the way we were.

Eventually, the slow and methodical movement wasn’t enough for either of us, and I held tightly to her head with both of my hands while I moved with more force. Her breasts werejiggling, rubbing against my chest and making me want to put my mouth back on them.

“Don’t give up,” I pleaded, with a husky tone. “Don’t make me leave, Jess.”

It was pathetic of me to beg, especially as we peaked from the love we were making. But I was desperate. I could feel her starting to squeeze and convulse beneath me. She was going to come, and then she’d return to her senses and tell me we had to stop. That she couldn’t risk her heart. That she couldn’t risk the emotions because of how it would affect Max.

“What if we don’t work?” she cried.

“I don’t know,” I confessed. “Doesn’t seem like that’s plausible, so I don’t know.”

“I can’t risk it. I’m already too far gone as it is.”

“Just come for me, baby.” I sped up slightly, hoping to push her over. “Let everything else go and just come.”

“Easton!” She cried, with tears falling down her cheeks as she climaxed beneath me.

“Fuck,” I yelled back, unable to articulate any other words as I came as well.

My mind was blank, a completely dark space where nothing mattered except the pleasure between us. It was so deep, there was a chance some of my memories would never return.Would Gramps even believe me if I told him I forgot how to shell butter beans?

“Oh God,” I breathed, then kissed her as I came back to the light.

As I rolled off of her, I pulled her with me, wanting her to stay close and not run immediately away. She didn’t fight it and wrapped her arm around my waist, holding me close to her as well.

After a few quiet minutes, I laughed. “I really do go blank, Jess. My mind just forgets everything when we’re together.”

Instead of laughing, she nodded and sighed. “Maybe that means you understand why I can’t do this. I can’t afford to lose my focus.”

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