Page 24 of Dirty Monsters

I should have been running in the opposite direction, but I couldn’t explain my draw to him, and I couldn't help but enjoy the tug.

His heart pounded like a hammer when we were chest to chest, and I felt the length of how much I was turning him on below the pants.

Then he'd pulled away, and the air between us felt cold, stilted. It gave me withdrawals without even knowing what I was withdrawing from.

I lived for the danger, the need, the thrill of any kind of high I could get. It was why cocaine had called to me so much in the past.

The conversation overall was very strange now that I’d tampered down the desire he flickered in me.

What I did know was one week into detox had me back to thinking things very inappropriate, like banging my nurse in Orange House. The only difference was my brain was less foggy, and I didn't want to sleep with him simply to get drugs afterward.

When he leaned over and whispered that we shouldn't be seen together, I agreed. I'm sure there were rules against fraternization between the nurses and patients. I didn't mind keeping it a secret. In fact, I smiled at my musing. Once he determined no one was around, he pulled me out. Like we were bank robbers, breaking the law. It gave me a rush. A familiar tingling feeling of adrenaline beneath my skin.

I didn't run when he released me. I wasn't running from this, from him. Under the bright lights, I saw him up close—the sharp jawline, the slightly messy hair, the minor curve to his nose like he'd broken it in a fight once, and those bright lips. He carried an edge, and I wanted to find out just how far the cliff would take me.

My mind was lost in reverence for him for the rest of the day. I wanted to get inside the mind of Nurse Ro and find out what made him tick. He was full of secrets waiting to break free, and I wanted to be the one to set them loose.

When it came time for our group session, I was an active participant. Mostly because I was too distracted to give them the same shit I normally did.

That night, I set my alarm for earlier than usual. I was done living in my caged bubble. I wanted to watch him surf. I'd be back in time for breakfast, and if anyone asked, I'd say I stepped outside for a walk.

He met me in my dreams repeatedly. I woke up with my body caked in sweat and lust.

My alarm blared off as the sun breached the earth for the day. I rose and dressed quickly, opening my door to make sure the coast was clear before I snuck out.

I made my way down the back stairwell, out the door, and down to the beach. I stopped behind the dunes to watch for a quiet second.

He was already there, putting his stuff down in his usual spot. My eyes lingered on his muscles as they stretched and constricted as he moved. The back view was as drool-worthy as the front.

Dropping a towel down, he sat down, surveying the ocean, and I wondered what he was thinking. Was he thinking about what today would hold? How he'd handle us living under the same roof? I was excited about it, but something held him back from giving in.

Standing up, he grabbed his board and walked toward the surf. His calf muscles were out of this world. Like, how did they even get to be so muscular?

I slipped down from the dune and found my way to his beach towel. I took off my flip-flops and let my feet sink into the chilled, early morning sand.

I'd put on a tank top. It dipped down to touch my chest and showed off the little cleavage I had. I managed to sport the shortest pair of shorts I could find too.

I rolled my eyes. No way did I need it. I could grab his attention without being half-dressed if the closet yesterday was any indication. Most men made decisions with the head beneath their pants instead of the one on their shoulders.

He didn't see me lie down on his beach towel, too lost in finding the perfect wave to ride. I watched as he lifted himself time and time again to surf the waves.

The squalls weren't very high, but the waves were decent. I let my eyes fly over the beach as I watched him.

A shack sat about a hundred feet down the beach. It was set back in the dunes a bit and had a tide pool glistening up to the entrance.

Standing up, I walked toward it to investigate a little further.

The shelter was secluded. If it was dark out, no one would even notice people back here. It gave me so many bad ideas.

The water chilled my feet as I dipped my toes into the tide pool. I took a minute to glance back toward where Ro was surfing. He still hadn't noticed me yet.

After I was done investigating, I found my way back to his towel and lost myself in a haze of him.

He hit waves for the next half an hour before he finally dipped off his board and started to tread water back toward me. His eyes found mine and a scowl emerged. I couldn't figure him out. His body was giving me all the right signs, but his brain was fighting it.

Water dripped and curved off him as he walked up to where I sat. "You shouldn't be here, Wren. Did you listen to anything I said yesterday?" His voice was laced with disappointment.

I shrugged my shoulders. "Rules were meant to be broken, Ro." I almost missed the smirk as it crossed his face. Although it was quickly replaced by his scowl again. So, he found some part of it amusing. Nodding toward the ocean, I asked the next question. "How long have you been surfing?"

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