Page 32 of The Love We Make

“Or not,” he added, after taking in my face.

“After next weekend, I am so busy that I doubt I see much of you anyway. And you have all those games out of town. It’s not like it will be much different. I was just thinking I should take some time to make sure it’s all separated so I can move on.”

Ethan started mindlessly nodding, though I’m not sure if he actually agreed with me. But he knew it wasn’t a terrible idea so he didn’t oppose it either. After a few more quiet minutes, he took a deep breath and answered me, “Fine.”

That wasn’t exactly the most agreeable response, but he agreed. So I left it at that.

Didn’t he see I was doing this for him? He may be able to have sex with someone and forget about it the next day. Hell, he did that all the time.

I was going to try my damnedest to be like him and do the same thing. But just in case, I think time away from each other would be just what I would need.

“Anything else?” He asked.

“Yes,” I said quickly before I lost the courage. “Are we going to kiss?”

Ethan sat up straighter and raised his eyebrows almost to his hairline. “Kiss?”

“Yes?” I said, wanting to cringe at my question. Although it was clearly a legit question.

“You aren’t sure if we are going to kiss?”

If I was talking to anyone else, I would have thrown up from embarrassment. But curiosity made me keep talking.

“I mean, it isn’t exactly vital to the mission. And it’s probably more intimate than you want to be. So I think we need to decide and agree beforehand.”

“Maddy, sweetheart, honey,” he was patronizing me and I almost punched him, but his next words stopped me in my tracks. “I am not taking this lightly. This is a huge fucking deal to me and I am going to make it fucking perfect for you. So kissing? Yes, that is happening. And so is everything else. I am not going to poke you and run. I am going to give you the night of your fucking life. I am going to make you come every which way I know how to. I am going to make damn sure that no matter what happens when we leave that you know two things for a fact. One, that asking me to be your first was a good idea because the more I think about it, it is a fantastic idea. And two, that every man that comes after me is held to the same standard. That you never settle for less than you deserve because you know exactly how to be treated, how to be loved, and how to make love. After next week, I am no longer going to have to worry about you because you won’t settle for anything less than whatIgive you.”

Fuck. Me.

Ethan had never spoken so blatantly to me. Chills ran down my spine as I kept my eyes locked with his. Heat had begun wrapping its way around us. The air was sizzling.

It wasn’t just me. His matter-of-fact speech affected him as well. His chest was rising and falling more noticeable than it had a few minutes ago. His hold on my feet had gotten stronger.

We sat eye to eye in silence for a few more minutes until I was finally able to think of words. “Ok,” I whispered. “After the All-star game, no condoms, no bedroom provisions, no one else knows, and a month before we see each other afterward.”

His slight nod was the only indication that he acknowledged me repeating our conditions. A thrill went through my body once again.

I thought by asking Ethan to be my first that he would literally get in and get out. That he would be quick and to the point. No kissing. No foreplay. No nothing.

But I guess he had other plans.

He wanted to make it a night to remember.

Thefirst timethat he thought I deserved.

A night to let our guard down.

A night we dropped the “just friends” tag.

A night to make love.

Chapter 13

Ethan

The plans for my All-star game start were going smoothly.

I had already rearranged my pitching rotation on the team and prepared myself for what I would be doing at the game.

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