Page 53 of Wanting a Family Man

“Can I ask you one thing? You don’t have to answer.” She dropped her hand and bit her lip. Her cheeks grew pink. Shy?

“What?”

“Have you ever had sex outdoors? I know that’s personal.” She put up a hand. “But I’ve been wondering since we made jokes about Nathan and Christina. I’m kind of jealous because they probably did, and I never have.”

“Come on, Cloe.” He looked to the sky. “You can’t tell me you havefantasiesand not expect me to want to fulfill them.”

“I just wondered,” she mumbled, craning her neck to look down from the rail. “Wait.” She jerked her head up. “Is that the problem? Do you think I’m into you because you’re famous? Thatthat’smy fantasy?”

“I can’t say it hasn’t crossed my mind.” He let the day pack slide off his shoulder, slipping the water bottle from its external pocket as he did. He offered it.

“Wow.” She took the bottle and popped the top, pouring a shot’s worth down her throat. “You could try having a little more self-esteem. Isn’t it possible that I like you, Trystan? That I’m attracted to the man? Unless you’re only attracted to me because I’m helpless. If so, you can go to hell.” She handed back the bottle.

“That’s why it’s a bad idea. Because you’re in a rough place.” Christ, he hated repeating himself. He took a long drink of water, gusting out his breath as he snapped the cap back into place. “You realize we’re bickering because we both want to have sex and know we shouldn’t.”

“Youdecided we shouldn’t. And that’s fine. Consent on both sides. I support that.” Her mouth pinched briefly. “But, just to be clear, I’m not trying to fill a page in my autograph book. Or fall in love. I’m just really tired of feeling only sadness and resentment and self-blame. You make me feel good, Trystan.” Her voice faded, telling him how vulnerable she felt admitting that. “That’s all I want. To feel good for a while.”

Ah, hell.

Chapter Thirteen

What she saidwas true, but saying it made her feel as though she was begging.Please like me. Please touch me. I’m so lonely.

She hugged herself as she stared at the water falling in lacy trails over the rocks, sorry she’d said anything.

“I have,” Trystan said. She could feel his gaze on the side of her face like the hottest midday sun. “Lots of times.”

“What?” She glanced at him.

“Had sex outdoors.”

“Lotsof times?” Withwho?

“I spend most of my life outside. It’s a numbers game.” He shrugged it off. “You’re from LA. I’m guessing you’ve had sex in a car?”

“Notlotsof times. You’ve probably had sex in a car more than I have. And in a boat.”

“With a goat. That’s a joke.” He waited a beat, then said, “It was a camel.”

“Oh, shut up,” she sputtered. “Now you’re just making me feel inadequate. It’s not a competition, Trystan.” It kind of was, but she already knew he was winning.

“I like seeing you laugh.” He stepped closer and cupped her face. “I really like it.” His thumbs caressed her cheeks. “Every time you smile, I want to feel it with my lips.”

“Trystan.” Her pulse skipped. She could hardly speak, she’d become so breathless. She splayed her hands on his waist, and dear God, the man was lean and honed and so innately strong, her knees grew weak.

He stole the smallest of kisses, one that was barely a drop when she was so parched, she thought she might die.

“Do you really want to?” he asked, shadows of concern in his eyes.

“Well, nothere.” She shifted one hand to the middle of his chest and looked around the viewing platform, then into the surrounding woods. “You’re the expert. Can’t you find us somewhere private?”

“Someone still might see us.” He took her hand, then snagged the day pack from where he’d left it, drawing her toward the picnic area. “That’s kind of what makes it fun, though. The danger.”

She was tingling with as much apprehension as anticipation. She wanted to have sex. She definitely wanted it to be with him. She was excited to try something new, but this was their first time. As much as she wanted to act like this was casual, she would have to look him in the eye later. Sheworkedfor him. Their relationship was complicated by Storm and all those other things she didn’t want to think about because look at him.

His shoulders were gorgeous mountains, his torso a mouth-watering wedge down to his muscled buttocks. Since when was she turned on by the back of a darkly tanned thigh and a calf muscle that looked carved from stained oak?

She wasn’t paying attention to where he was taking her. He drew her along an overgrown path where tendrils from the berry bushes closed in and brushed her arms and legs as they passed. The ocean disappeared behind her, and she had the strong sense that she would be very lost if he let go of her hand.

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