Page 2 of Hard to Kill

“He’s scared this time,” I say to Jimmy.

“You mean he wasn’t scared last time of living out his days in a federal prison?”

“Last time he had us,” I say.

Jacobson is doing something he never used to do on his way into the courthouse in Riverhead: ignoring the questions being shouted at him, from both sides of the railings.

He only stops when he sees Jimmy and me.

As soon as he does, he taps Howie on the shoulder and holds up a finger, telling him to wait.

Then walks right over to me, ignoring Jimmy.

“Janie,” he says, suddenly back into character and back in charge of things. “You shouldn’t have.”

“You’re right. I shouldn’t have.”

“Come on. Admit that you’ve missed me.”

I make a gesture that takes in the whole scene.

“What I don’t miss is all this.”

“You sure?” he says.

“Like they say, Rob. Another fine mess.”

“I’m innocent.”

“Tell it to your new judge.”

Before I can step back, he is leaning close to me. “We need to talk.”

Howie Friedlander wants to hear what’s being said, so he steps in, puts a hand on Jacobson’s arm, and gently pulls him toward the courthouse doors.

“We need to get this over with,” Howie says.

I watch as the doors open and two cops who could double as bouncers step outside. One of them is carrying handcuffs, which means shit is about to get very real for Rob Jacobson.

Again.

Before they put the cuffs on him, he turns around and looks back, his eyes suddenly pleading with me. Not even trying to hide how scared he is, Jacobson puts one of his free hands—while they stillarefree—to his ear and mouths as if into a phone:Call me.

Then, as if he’s silently shouting at me, he mouths one last word:

Please.

Then the cuffs go on him and the doors open back up and he’s gone.

Jimmy sees me staring in Jacobson’s direction. Maybe he can see in my eyes that I didn’t just tell Jacobson the whole truth. I don’t miss scenes like this, thatisthe truth. But I do want to be inside the courthouse, breathing that air again, instead of being out here, like I’m on the sidelines at the big game.

“Why do you look like you’ve got a hook in your mouth?” Jimmy asks.

“Probably because I do.”

TWO

IT DOESN’T TAKE LONG for my friends in the media to move right in on me after Jacobson is inside the courthouse.

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