Page 85 of Heir

Her fingers were numb and clumsy in the predawn chill of the inn’s stables, and she cursed when the buckles to her saddlebags kept slipping. She should have known that someone who was so sinfully skilled with his hands would be awful in every other way.

Quil had hidden it well, certainly. Acting noble and princely. Making that damned poultice for her and applying it every day. Looking at her in that way he had, like he felt nothing and everything and that he might want her the way she wanted him.

Ugh. There. She’d admitted it to herself.

But he was like every other man. Blaming his problems on others and too petty and narcissistic to realize that perhaps he, too, was occasionally at fault. It was insulting, really. Unforgivably rude.

Sirsha didn’t need him anymore. Curse the bleeding oath coin. She’d take discomfort and pain over a single moment more with that—

“Sirsha.”

She jumped, and glared at Quil, further irritated that he’d managed to sneak up on her.

“Don’t worry,” she snarled. “I’m heading out. No need to concern yourself with Sirsha, the awful, horrible liar—”

She glanced up at him and—was that a bleeding smile on his face?

“Stop.” He put his hands on hers, and she went still. Not because his touch sent a thrill up her spine, but because his skin was lovely and warm and she wanted to leech his heat away.

“Sirsha, I owe you an apology.”

“Oh” was all that Sirsha could think to say.

She looked down at his hands, which was distracting, because they were strong and quite beautiful, and they reminded her of how he’d pulled her close last night with more interest than seemed strictly necessary to drive R’zwana away.

“I shouldn’t have gotten so angry,” he said. “Usually, I’m in better control of my feelings, but I—” His hair fell into his face as he looked down. “I hate what they’ve done to us.” His voice was low, but she felt the anger thrumming through it. “The Kegari. I hate that I’m not with my aunt, fighting. I hate that I ran.”

He pulled his hands away, and Sirsha had to fight herself not to take them back. “Right before the Kegari came, I wanted to abdicate,” he said. “My father was a terrible emperor—cruel and selfish and violent, and I suppose I feared that I’d end up the same.”

“You won’t,” Sirsha said. “Enigmatic and bossy, perhaps. But vicious—that’s not your style.”

Quil smiled at that. “Doesn’t matter now. I’d been reluctant to rule my whole life, but when the chance was taken from me—” He sighed. “I felt lost. Ifeellost.”

Sirsha’s breath caught at the honesty of what he was saying. The familiarity. She knew what it was to be unmoored.

“None of that excuses me getting upset with you,” Quil went on, and the words made her feel safe. Valued. As if she was worthy of the truth.

“I wish I’d known about the magic, but that’s my problem. Not yours.” He glanced behind him at Sufiyan and Arelia, who were not-so-surreptitiously eavesdropping.

“We chatted,” Quil said. “We think it would be helpful to meet your friend—the one you suggested we speak to.”

“On one condition,” Sufiyan spoke up. “We don’t keep secrets from one another. Not important ones, anyway. Obviously if you fantasize about becoming a Nevennes sheepdog and running howling into the woods, you can keep that to yourself.”

“So, Sirsha,” Quil said. “Is there anything else we should know before we get back on the road with you?”

Sirsha looked between the three of them, her irritation rising. She felt waylaid.

“We like you.” Arelia cut into her thoughts. “A lot. But we must be able to count on each other.”

At Arelia’s frank words, Sirsha’s anger fizzled. She didn’t know how to explain the shadow in her head, the sense of being watched.

It must be R’zwana. Maybe her sister had simply changed her methods.

“No more secrets,” Sirsha said. “Truly. And it’s a dragon.” At the trio’s confused glance, she smiled. “I fantasize about transforming into a dragon. And flying howling into the wilderness, after crisping my enemies.”

“I can support that,” Arelia murmured. Sirsha laughed and looked Quil full in the face because she didn’t want him to think she had anything to hide. Immediately, she regretted it because his gaze sharpened. For a moment, she thought he’d accuse her of deception. But he only shrugged.

“Alas that you aren’t a dragon. We could use one. Let’s get moving.” He made for his horse, Sufiyan and Arelia following.

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