Page 141 of Promise Me Not

Slowly, I push into a sitting position, sneakily scooting back a few feet, and spread my legs out on the carpet.

My arms are outstretched and shaking as I stare at this little freaking miracle, afraid he might fall even though he looks steady as a rock standing there. “Little D, are you walking now?” I don’t mean to whisper, but the words come out that way.

Deaton keeps on clapping, and then his right leg lifts, planting down a few inches forward.

Fumbling around, I quickly shove my hand in my pocket, snag my phone, and press record before propping it up with some of the pillows to our left, hoping to hell he’s in the shot.

My mom is gonna die when she sees this.

Unless she already knows.

Maybe everyone knowsbutme.

Pressure falls on my chest, but when his left leg lifts and he comes even closer, all that washes away.

“Baby boy, you’re walking.” I smile, holding my hands out.

And Deaton damn near runs forward, clearing the last five steps with ease. He slams into my chest with a laugh and squeezes my cheeks with his slobbery hands.

“Oh my god,” I laugh, my arms lifting him from the floor. “Daddy’s so proud of y-you.”

I don’t realize what I’ve said util the words are out there, and I squeeze my eyes closed, tucking him closer for another quiet moment.

“Ba, ba, ba,” he babbles next.

A low, raspy chuckle escapes me, and I spin him, tucking him in my lap as I reach for his bag and pull out the small sippy cup from the corner pocket. “Man, you are getting big. Talking andwalking and a big boy cup?” I murmur, handing it to him to see if he knows what to do.

Sure enough, he tips it back, gazing up at me and tugging on my hoodie strings as he takes a few small sips of water.

My hand lifts, and I run my fingers over his soft curls, staring down into his big blue eyes.

This must be what it’s like to have to share a child with a second family, like a family of divorce.

Bone-splitting sadness envelops me, and I wince at the literal pain it causes. I can’t imagine not being with the mother of my child. It would be pure torture every day knowing you’re missing something. I think I’d want to do everything I could to make it work.

I blink, shaking my head.

What the hell am I talking about? That is exactly what’s going on here, and I have tried everything. Because I am the other half. Blood or not, he’s still mine.

Even if she won’t be.

Why the fuck won’t she be?

Because you’re not enough, and you never will be.

I thought I understood, but I don’t.

She promised me.

She promised, and I wish she would have just…not.

CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE

Mason

Now,November

Turnsout Payton’s new project is bigger than the last one. Not only was she personally requested for another collab between Embers Elite and Avix, but she’s been asked to take headshots of the entire Sharks roster.

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