Page 12 of Tiers of Joy

“Sorry dear, I haven't seen it. I haven't watched a movie since 1959. The last one I saw was ‘Some like it Hot’ with Marilyn Monroe, Tony Curtis, and Jack Lemmon. Have you seen it dear?” She asks.

“No, I'm afraid I haven't.” I smile.

“Oh you must! It’s wonderful, very funny. And of course Marilyn is just stunning! You're like a modern day Marilynn.” She states.

The only thing I have in common with Marilyn Monroe is that I'm blonde, but my hair is long. I'm probably around the same size she was. I have a dusting of freckles across my nose and I'm no way near as glamorous and I very rarely wear make up.

“Thank you.” I answer kindly.

I try and watch the air steward doing the emergency procedures, or as I like to call it the ‘if we crash to our deaths’ demonstration, but the elderly lady keeps chatting away.

“So are you visiting family or going on holiday?” She enquires.

“I'm actually moving out there.” I say smiling.

“Oh how wonderful! I'm just going to visit my daughter; she married a Canadian man and now lives out there. Not sure how many more trips I will be able to take though. So have you met a hunky man or is your husband working out there?” She asks.

“I’m moving out there on my own. My husband passed away nearly ten months ago.” I give her a sad smile.

“Oh my dear girl, so young to be a widow. Can an old lady give you some advice?” She asks, squeezing my hand.

“Sure.” I nod.

“From one widow to another, it does get easier. You will never stop missing them and there will always be that hole in your heart for them, but you’ll have the chance to find love again and make that hole smaller. I shall always miss my Edward, but one day I will meet him again.” She smiles.

“How long were you married for?” I ask.

She pulls out her purse and shows me a photograph of her wedding day.

“This year we would have been married for fifty years. I lost him ten years ago now. I'm just thankful that I got so many years with him; he was the love of my life, oh, and a fantastic lover.” She winks.

I choke on my laughter.

“Just because I'm an old lady dear that doesn’t mean I don’t miss the sex! Let me tell you in our youth we had quite the sessions. I could teach that Mr Grey a thing or too.” She states.

“You’ve read Fifty Shades of Grey?” I ask, stunned.

“Of course, thoroughly enjoyed it too! I’ve read a lot of romance and erotic novels, keeps me youthful.” She smiles.

I smile back. Maybe this long haul flight won’t drag so much after all.

“I'm Esme by the way.” I say as I hold out my hand.

“Doris.” She smiles and shakes my hand.

The plane’s engines rev ready for take-off. I grip my seat as my nerves takeover. Doris places her hand on mine reassuringly.

I breathe a sigh of relief once we’re in the air. Take-off and landing just scare the crap out of me.

Doris and I continue to talk. She tells me all about her five grandchildren, where her daughter lives in Canada, and that she has a son who lives back in England who is a doctor. I share stories about Jay and I. It’s the first time I've been able to speak about him properly with anyone that isn’t Sally and not get upset. Maybe it’s because I know that Doris has experienced it too, that she understands what it is like to lose that huge part of your life.

Ten and half hours later we land in Halifax Nova scotia.

At the luggage collection I help Doris with her bags and give her a hug goodbye.

“I wish you all the luck in the world, my dear girl. Now be careful of these Canadian men, they have quite the charm.” She winks and waves, walking off to her waiting daughter and grandchildren.

I lug my three cases onto a trolly. It just so happens to have a wonky wheel and squeaks the whole time. I struggle to push the bastard trolly to the car hire desk.

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