Page 13 of The Alpha's Fated Bond

These feelings I have for Alex, I’ve called them love, but I don’t really know. When he talks to me the way he just did, I feel anxious and worked up. I want to run away, but I also want to stick around and listen to him. I want to smile, but I don’t want him to think that I’m desperate for his attention.

It’s like being stuck in a constant battle with myself.

Alex hasn’t been pushing me, though. He’s not forceful or demanding of my time or my touch. He teases me sometimes, revealing a hidden side of himself. But there’s a possessiveness in his eyes when he looks at me or talks to me. He treats me gently but doesn’t hover over me. In fact, I would say he regards me as an equal, yet he’s protective of me.

When we return to the campsite, Nathan is talking to Lily. I watch them from the trees and realize that they might be close in age. Usually, Nathan is very quiet and reserved, and aside from his one outburst when he tried to kill me back in Oakrest, I haven’t seen him act out of sorts. He’s smiling at Lily, but I can see the caution in his eyes.

Trust.

Alex’s friends have difficulty trusting others. After all, they have suffered greatly over the past two decades. From what Alex has told me, his father used to be the leader of the North Alliance before Karina murdered him. It was a treacherous act, and Alexwas left alive solely because shifter laws do not allow children to be harmed.

But I’m sure Queen Karina tortured him in other ways. Alex became Alpha at the age of ten, a puppet whose strings were in the hands of the Queen of the Alliance, a woman so hungry for power that she crushed a majority of the packs under her.

I don’t understand this greediness for power that she has. If she destroys every pack within the North Alliance that she reigns over, what will be left for her to rule? A wasteland?

Patrick and Jared have returned and are now roasting a deer in the fire pit. They left to find some dinner for us as soon as we’d stopped to camp for the night. Patrick lifts his hand when he sees us and calls out my name. Alex nudges me, and I find myself walking over to his friend.

“Did it work this time?” Patrick asks.

I shake my head, and he gives me a sympathetic smile.

“Don’t worry. You’ll get there. Have something to eat. You’ll feel much better after.”

I’m about to sit down next to him when Alex plucks me from mid-air and seats me on a log adjacent to where his friend is sitting.

“Not so close,” he says pleasantly.

When I glance at him, his eyes are dark, and he whispers, “I’m a very possessive man, Sophia. Try not to sit too close to males who aren’t me.”

Taken aback by his behavior, I watch him as he sits down next to me and breaks off a piece of the deer leg, which is perfectly roasted. As we share the meat, I can’t stop thinking about his words. Is he really going to be like that? And do I hate it?

My wolf is quite pleased by his behavior, but I don’t know what to think. It’s not unpleasant, but I wonder if he’s like this because I don’t have his mating mark yet. I think it was Elsa who told me that the mark is typically given during sex. But we don’t…I mean, he hasn’t tried to sleep with me. So, when does he plan to give me his mark?

I don’t even know how to broach the subject. What will he think of me if I ask him about this?

I stare down at the meat in my hand.

I was never an overthinker before. Now, I’m analyzing each and every interaction with Alex. I’m obsessing over what he thinks of me or what he will think of me if I behave or act in a certain manner. It’s exhausting.

And it is completely unlike me.

After we all eat, Lily and I sit together again.

“You have to completely empty your mind,” she instructs me. “Don’t think of nature. Don’t think of anything. Just try to feel the power inside you. I cannot explain it in any other terms. You will understand what I mean once you feel it.”

I close my eyes and tune out every sound except those of the wind, the night critters, and the winged creatures in the distance. While I am able to block out the noise from the peoplearound me, try as I may, I’m unable to do so where nature is concerned. Those sounds are amplified.

Once again, I feel the same energy inside me that builds each time those golden light orbs show up. I’m about to stop, feeling defeated, when I remember how Alex claimed to have faith in me.

I need to have faith in myself.

I have to keep going.

I hear a buzzing sound around me, as if someone is talking, but I ignore it.

I keep searching within, and suddenly, my fingers start to tingle. The sensation spreads to my arms, through my chest, and throughout my body.

There!

---