Page 39 of His Mansion

10

Alpine Responsibility Code

Rule #10—Share the responsibility for a safe experience with others.

Jack sprawled on the couch and sucked on his beer. He stared at the bottle mindlessly for a minute before focusing on the label. The icy cold local brew—called Faceplant—always made Dara giggle when she handed them out, and he gritted his teeth together and turned up the volume on the television. He flicked through channels and wondered if Kane was even going to come home tonight.

Damn it, why’d he leave? He could have been there with them right now, or better yet, they should have hauled Dara into their apartment and his king-sized bed.

He held the bottle to his temple. Right. For tonight. And tomorrow. But what about after that? What about when he couldn’t hold back any longer and started taking charge again, not only of Dara, but Kane?

He couldn’t do it. He couldn’t put aside his need to lead in the bedroom. For the second half of the trip he’d tried that, forcing down his more dominating urges. Trying to change the way he operated had made him lose something fundamental. Even though he was controlling when it came to sex, he had always connected emotional caring with the physical demands he made. He hadn’t even realized that had been missing for the past day until he’d heard Kane as they prepared to take Dara together. Kane had been the one with the soft words, talking about making love. Talking about wanting to be there to support her. Wanting to share the experience so it became much more than just a physical thrill.

Dara and Kane were the ones who deserved to be together, without him coming in and ordering their world. Changing his spots seemed impossible, no matter how much the offer she’d made tempted him.

Maybe I could deal with it if it meant I could have Dara.

Fuck.

No, this was a better way. He’d use the excuse of society, and after a while Dara and Kane would accept it. Somehow he’d find a way to not let them know he was slowly dying as they carried on in front of him.

The door opened with a clatter and he startled upright. Kane entered, his pack on his back. He stared at Jack, looked as if he was about to speak, then turned and headed silently to his room.

Jack stared morosely at the screen. Great. Now all three of them were miserable. He was a fucking genius, he was.

Kane rattled around for a while in the back of the apartment. The shower clicked on and Jack found himself with his hand on the front door before jerking to a stop. His body was ready to return to her without any qualms at all.No. He had to give this breathing time. He paced back to the couch.

But there was no reason why he couldn’t call her. Just to make sure she was all right.

She answered on the fourth ring.

“Jack?”

“Umm, just wanted to make sure you were okay.”

Silence on the line. A soft sniff. “I’m fine.”

“You want to come over and watch some TV with me?” Sheesh, pathetic much? Surely he could beg a little harder. Throw in a few grovels for good measure. He’d been away from her for what? Thirty minutes, and he was caving already.

“Kane’s coming here.” She whispered the words and his heart stopped in mid-beat. “He’s just grabbing a shower and some stuff, and said he’d spend the night.”

A dagger of pain went through him. His best friend worked damn fast. Still, this was what he wanted, wasn’t it? “Okay. Well. Later then?—”

“Jack, I love you.”

He scrambled for words, but before he could answer, she hung up.

She loved him? He buried his face in his hands. She loved him, but his best friend was going to be the one in her bed tonight.

Because I’m an idiot.

Jack wasn’t sure how long he sat there, numb and needy. Wishing he could see a way out of the hellish hole he’d dug for himself. Behind him, Kane cleared his throat, and Jack forced himself to turn and look him in the eye.

“I’m heading over to Dara’s. You’re welcome to come.”

Inside his belly, anger and frustration battled. “I said no.”

“You said a lot of things over the past few days, mainly to Dara, but I’ve been listening as well. You talked about not feeling guilty over what brings you pleasure. About trusting yourself. Not rushing into any decisions.”

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