Page 31 of Cook

Maddie curled into my arms, trembling, and holding me as tightly as I was holding her. She nestled her wet face into my shirt. Her hot tears soaked through the fabric and slicked my skin. Goose bumps rushed across me.

I pulled her closer.

“Vivi, please sit down,” said Leo, shooting me a look.

Sweat beaded on his temples. Leo was trained to deal with Mom’s episodes, and I paid his agency according to his qualifications. But Maddie was an altogether different case, and he wasn’t being paid enough to deal with her.

I hadn’t even considered him when I left this morning. Leo came regularly to make sure Mom took her pills, and he played games with her during the day when I had to be out. Leo took care of her when I had to stay in Park Ridge for long periods on MC business or the times when the club had all ridden up to the warehouse in LA, now home to a second branch of The Ridge MC.

It had taken six months for Mom to get used to Leo, andMaddie... fuck, I didn’t think about her. I hadn’t thought about how she would be around him. She hadn’t reacted this way around me or some of the MC, not around Doc either. What about Leo had set her off? I dragged my gaze over him, scrutinizing every little thing about the beanpole.

While she had gone feral on Doc and Doctor Richardson at the recovery house, that had been lashing out. This collapsing in on herself was something I had never seen in Maddie, even when I’d saved her.

I curled her tighter into my chest, tempted to run her out of the house like I was a firefighter. That would leave Mom behind, but she managed well in her house. She had plenty to clean and satisfy her obsession. She might not ever be what others would consider normal, but she functioned well enough in her own little world.

With Mom and Leo, things worked out like clockwork every day. Mom couldn’t go back to Park Ridge after all that happened there with my daddy, but Maddie couldn’t stay here.

“Vivi, let’s focus on...” began Leo, moving toward Mom, but Maddie jumped in my grasp, like Leo spoke to her.

“Leo,” I called out, and he whirled toward me, his fluster showing in ruddy splotches across his face. He leaned back on his heel, pulling away.

“Sorry,” I muttered. I didn’t mean to bark, but excuse me for losing my shit too. Why shouldn’t I when everyone else had? “Get out,” I ordered.

“But,” said Leo, his mouth dangling open. His body leaned toward the door then away, as if he fought with himself to make the stay-or-go choice. “My job.”

He wasn’t losing that today, but I needed to figure this shit out without him triggering Maddie.

“Go. Now,” I commanded.

Leo Finch scampered out of the house, closing the front door behind him, and leaving his sweater on the chair.

Maddie continued to cry. Her fingers had curled into my shirt, all but digging a hole into the fabric with her fingernails. She had drawn my blood with claw marks on my neck, and it stung. When I touched it gently, the scabbing had already started.

It didn’t matter much to me. She could scratch me and hit me and ruin whatever clothes of mine she wanted if it made her feel better. Somehow, I didn’t believe those actions would help.

Instead, I pulled her tighter to my chest and cooed, “Maddie, look at me. Leo’s gone. You’re safe. You’re okay. I’m here.”

I’m here.If only she understood that.

“I’m going to help you,” I promised, and her tremors slowed. I had been trying to help her since the moment I’d found her at Barton Mill. Since I’d taken her from the hospital, even though I couldn’t explain to myself why I had.! “Come on, Maddie. I have you.”

I stood, cradling her close to my chest.

Mom sat at the coffee table, continuing her tea party alone. She filled her delicate cup from the kettle. She pretended to serve tea to others, too, but no one was there. She was happier when she was alone, falling back into a childlike state.

Play had been how she kept herself safe from my daddy, even when I was a kid. She needed a girl to play with like that. I’d been too into cars and all the wildlife around our house when I was a kid. Sometimes I played her games, considering it just something adults did.

When I got older—and met Celt—I realized how wrong I was.

Mom, while quirky, would be fine though. We managed her condition well enough. Maddie, on the other hand, couldn’t be somewhere like this.

“Mom, I’ll be back later,” I said, but Mom didn’t even look at me. It was like she couldn’t hear me. With the crying Maddie in my arms, I walked her to my bedroom.

Maddie

In Cook’s bedroom, I curledmy legs as far as they could go to my chest. My heart pounded, but my leaky eyes dried.

Why the hell had I broken down like that? I had been so strong.