Page 117 of Mistaken Impression

“You’ve never what? Never been in love before?”

“No, I haven’t. But that’s not what I’m trying to say.” I look at his chest, at the button on his shirt. “H—He was my first.” Hunter doesn’t reply and after a few seconds, I raise my head to find him staring down at me, confusion written all over his face. “Is that a surprise?”

“Would you hate me if I said ‘yes’?”

“No. I’ve always known how you and Drew lived your lives, and I guess you just assumed the same about me.”

“Not exactly the same, no,” he says, smiling, although I can’t return the gesture.

“I—I was waiting for the right man, and I thought I’d found him. Mac said I had, but…”

He pulls me into a hug again. “Do you wanna come eat with us?” he says after a while, leaning back and looking down at me.

“No, thanks. I’m exhausted. I’m gonna go to bed.”

He frowns, narrowing his eyes. “You’ve gotta eat something, Ella.”

“I will, don’t worry.”

I’m not sure he’s convinced, but he doesn’t argue with me, and he leans forward, kissing my forehead. “I’ll let you get some rest, but promise me you’ll fix yourself something to eat?”

I nod my head and he smiles… but once he’s gone, closing the door behind him, I switch off the lights and climb the stairs to my bedroom.

Inside, I undress, leaving my phone on the nightstand, and get into bed. Then I pull up the covers and wrap myself up in them, letting sleep claim me.

I’ve been awake since just after dawn. I didn’t close the drapes last night, so I watched the sun rise through the picture window, staring out across the harbor, and trying not to cry. It’ll be cold outside, but the sky is a perfect clear blue, and I wonder about maybe going for a walk later. I haven’t stepped outside since I got back here, and I need to get some fresh air… and to reassure Hunter that I’m okay, even if I’m not.

My phone beeps. I know who it’ll be. It’s eight-thirty, and even though it’s Saturday, it’s time for Kennedy’s first message of the day. I turn over, clutching up my phone and flip it around so I can read what she’s got to say for herself.

— Ella, I’m sure you’re aware of the situation here. We need to discuss your contract as soon as possible. Can you call me? Look forward to hearing from you. KB

I don’t know why I bother reading her messages anymore. They’re all the same. She probably just copies and pastes them.

I’m not about to reply. I don’t want to get into a long, drawn-out conversation with her, or give her a reason to call me… but I could send that email Hunter and I were talking about.

At least, I could, once I’ve been to the bathroom…

Leaping out of bed, I rush to my adjoining bathroom, wishing now that I’d eaten something last night. I feel a little lightheaded and I don’t hang around. I’m just drying my hands when my phone rings, and I let out a curse. Does this mean Kennedy’s going to start callingandtexting? You would have thought my silence alone would have made the message clear… at least, it would to most people. Just not to Kennedy, evidently.

I saunter back to my bed, where I left my phone, face-up on the mattress, and suck in a breath when I see the word ‘Mac’ on the screen.

My legs feel like they’re going to give way beneath me, and I take the last two steps, collapsing onto the mattress and staring down at my phone. I reach out to pick it up, but pull my hand away.

Why is he phoning? He’s had long enough to think up an apology, if that’s what this is all about. Unless it’s something else…

I guess there’s only one way to find out, and I reach out again, my hand shaking, just as the ringing stops.

Why didn’t I answer sooner?

For a split second, I wonder about calling him back, to ask what he wants… but I can’t. I can’t forget the way he looked at me when he accused me of betraying him.

My phone beeps, making me jump, and I glance at the screen again. He’s left a message? Oh… God. Do I want to listen to it? Am I strong enough to hear his voice?

I guess I have to be, if I want to know why he called.

I pick up my phone, barely able to breathe.

‘Hi, Ella. It’s me. I… um… I don’t know what to say. I’ve been trying to talk myself out of calling you, but… well, it’s been two weeks since Vermont, and… and I guess what I’m trying to say is, if you need to talk, you only have to call.Things may not have ended well between us, but I’m here if you need me. Okay?’

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