Page 9 of Dreaming of Dawson

I feel like a fool for not realizing sooner… but I’m not exactly firing on all cylinders. I rarely am these days.

“Of course. That’s not exactly ideal.”

“No, but it’s less of a problem than Sabrina realizes. I think she assumed her plans were going to ruin our honeymoon, and that we’d either have to cancel or take Nash with us.”

“You mean you haven’t told her you’re not going away?”

He shakes his head. “No. If I told her it’s because we can’t afford it, she’d only gloat, and I’m done with hearing about myinadequacies from my ex-wife. I had enough of it when we were married.”

I’d like to say I can relate to his predicament, but to be fair, Stevie was never like that. Even when she was walking out the door, she didn’t say a word against me. She was generosity itself – other than the obvious fact that she was leaving me. But her attitude didn’t stop me from feeling like I must have let her down… like I wasn’t enough for her.

Why else would she have left me for another man?

“What are you gonna do about having Nash around on your wedding night?” I ask, to keep my mind off of my failed marriage.

“Zara came up with a plan,” he says.

“Oh?”

“Yeah. She’s invited her mom to stay.”

“Seriously? You’re gonna spend your wedding night with your sonandyour mother-in-law?”

He chuckles. “Oh, it gets better. Because Sylvia doesn’t want to leave Zara’s Aunt Charlotte to fend for herself, she’s coming too. I know it’s a little unconventional, but at least Charlotte isn’t as difficult as she used to be. Sylvia assures us she’s a changed woman… not that I ever met her before. And Sylvia and Nash get along really well, so Zara suggested her mom could look after Nash.”

“At your place?”

“Yeah. Obviously, it would be better if Sylvia and Charlotte lived closer and could take Nash home with them for the night, but at least this way, we’ll have more time to ourselves.”

“With your mother-in-law, Aunt Charlotte and Nash in the house? On your wedding night? You have remembered what that’s supposed to be about, haven’t you?”

“Of course, but it’s not just about one night, is it? You and I both know that. And so does Zara. We’ve got a lifetime of nightsahead of us…” His voice fades and I wonder if he’s as happy about the situation as he’s pretending.

“That’s true,” I say, making an effort to sound upbeat… and it really is an effort.

“And looking on the bright side, at least it’s actually feasible now we’ve moved.”

He’s not wrong there. His old apartment above the bookstore only had two bedrooms, so Sylvia wouldn’t have been able to stay – let alone bring Aunt Charlotte with her – and even if the setup doesn’t sound like most people’s idea of the perfect wedding night, it seems like they’ve decided this is how they wanna play things.

I’m sure I could think of something better, though… and maybe I can.

“Yeah…” I say, while that thought drifts around my head. “And it could have been worse. Sabrina could have announced she was taking Nash with her.”

Tanner shakes his head. “It wouldn’t have surprised me. She knows he’s gonna be my best man, and I half expected her to try something like that.”

“I guess you should be grateful, then.”

“That’s what Zara said when I got back home last night. I was so fucking angry, but she persuaded me it wasn’t worth it.”

“She’s very accommodating of Sabrina,” I say, leaning on the bar.

“She is. She’s a very special woman…” He looks right at me, tilting his head. “Now all we need to do is find one for you.”

I shake my head, ignoring the way it makes my brain rattle. “Even if we did – and I don’t think we ever will – there’s no way I’m gonna get married again.”

“Really?” He seems surprised by that, although God knows why.

“No. Not after everything that happened with Stevie.”

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