I risk a look at her. “Yeah?” Myrelief.It’s monumental.

“Yes,” Inara sighs. And her relief sounds monumental too. “Because I am bonded to you, and I knew that was happening. Also because I’m pregnant.”

You know how I obeyed traffic laws and didn’t whip us over to the nearest curb for a quickie?

News of this magnitude calls for me signaling and yanking us out of traffic and safely delivering us curbside so I can jerk us into park.

“WHAAAAT DID YOU SAY?” I ask calmly. “WE CAN… HUMANS AND ALIENS…”

“Matt, stop shouting,” Inara says patiently.

“SLORRY,” I shout-mumble, dragging a hand through my hair and over my face. Then I strain the limits of my seatbelt and hop on her, squeezing her up in a hug. “You and me have… we made a baby?”

From my anaconda arms, Inara confirms, “Possibly a litter. And I hoped you would be amenable to living on my homeworld. You have been showing me the actions of a mate, when you fed me from your hand and when you've hoarded my things.”

“Hoarded your things? What are you talking—”

“You take my gum wrappers, and you keep them," she states.

“That— You think—”

I shut my mouth.

Because if sticking her gum wrappers in my pockets so we don’t become litterbugs would, in her culture, be enough to show her I’m into her? Fine. I freakinaminto her.

I drive us the rest of the way to work like I’m being tested for my driver’s permit. I don’t even use my middle-finger to assist in directing any traffic, not once. We steer slowly into our parking lot, I get us to our usual spot of honor (an extra wide parking space withTHE BOSSspray painted on the asphalt), and with a shell-shocked exhale of disbelief, I put us in park.

After a moment of staring out the windshield, I turn for Inara. Bringing her close, making a fist in her hair, I keep her head angled for my mouth to take her. When I pull back enough we can look at each other, with her eyes pinned to mine, I make the declaration I should have started with months ago. I should have told her how I felt, used these words the moment I knew.

“I love you, Inara of the Bone Grinder’s cave.”

Her eyes go wet at the fact I remembered the name she gave me on the day we met.

“I’d ask you to stay here with me if I could, because I love my home too. Since that’s not a safe plan, I guess we’ve got to find a way for me to live on your world, because, baby? You’re not getting rid of me.” I brush my knuckles over her soft-scaled cheek before placing my hand on her stomach. “Let me group text my mom and sisters.”

CHAPTER 24

It’s the day after Inara’s announcement; a gorgeous, sunny Saturday. My family arrived at my place sans their husbands, because those smart bastards knew the moment they heardMe Before Youthat they wanted no part of movie dust-in-their-eyes hell.

So it’s just my mom and sisters who meet Inara.

They stop dead when they see her.

Inara waves. “Hello, Matthew’s beautiful family. I’m Inara.”

“She’s an alien from another planet,” I tell them. “And no, this isn’t a prank.”

My family would probably still assume I was pulling one over on them, or trying, except Inara happens to be cooking our steaks using nothing but a frying pan and fire from her own mouth, and coupled with her ears and tail, which move too fluidly to be a prosthetic, plus her scales, I suppose, everyone settles into a shocked sort of silence for the first, oh, thirty-one and a half seconds.

And then everyone’s talking at once.

“Hold up,” I say, laughing. “Inara, meet my Mom, Lillian Shawnessy. Then over there in the pink blouse is Elaine. Kate is in the sundress. This here is Kaley, and Kerry is rocking the fire engine-red hair. Wow, Kerry. How does Doug feel about being married to Jessica Rabbit?”

“It’s called Red Velvet, and I love it,” Kerry says, fluffing her hair with a goofy smile. “So does Doug.”

“I bet,” I mutter, eyeing her siren-red locks.

“It’s lovely,” Inara says with genuine appreciation—and these two words get everyone’s attention back on her, and the questions start flying.