Page 25 of Sinful Desires

And then I basically lost my mind and decided it would be a good idea to disgrace myself.

By the sounds of it, most of the house was awake. There was noise coming from the kitchen—pots and pans, the clanking of silverware. The girls would have breakfast ready soon, and I would only look suspicious if I didn’t join everybody when it came time to eat. I was hungry as hell, too, and could’ve used an entire pot of coffee after spending most of the night tossing and turning, berating myself, regretting how easy it was to forget what I knew to be true.

I could not trust Miles. He had never bothered taking back those shitty comments he first made at the penthouse. I couldn’t believe he didn’t mean them any more than I believed he hadn’t meant to look at me with so much contempt all those times I had noticed him watching me.

I read once that women tended to ignore their instincts and talk themselves out of following their gut. We liked to make excuses for people’s bad behavior and, in some cases, would end up regretting it.

I refused to be one of those people.

That didn’t mean it would be easy to look him in the eye now that he knew what my boobs felt like and how little it took to turn me into a mindless idiot searching for an orgasm.

Christ, how embarrassing.

I had done it to myself when I knew better. There was no escaping him either, here or back home. Could I not have controlled my raging hormones for a little while longer? It would’ve been smarter to come back here and take care ofmyself. Alone. In bed. I wouldn’t have to dread showing my face downstairs.

“Hey! You better get down here and eat before it’s all gone!” I would’ve known my sister’s strident voice anywhere. Knowing she would only come in and physically drag me from the room, I got up, pulled on a robe, ran a brush through my hair, and eased open the door.

What had been a dull roar became a much louder one. That was one thing about the cabin. There wasn’t much to dampen sound waves with so many hard surfaces and so much space.

Creeping up to the railing, I looked down to find everybody gathering. The air smelled of coffee and bacon. What a shame I was too busy hating myself to look forward to eating.

“There you are!” Valentina wore a worried, motherly look when she spotted me. “Get your ass down here or risk Lucian eating everything.”

“It’s only my second helping,” he retorted around a mouthful of food.

Something was missing. No. Somebody. I didn’t want to come straight out and ask where Miles was for fear of making it look obvious how much I cared. “Tell me you at least left some coffee,” I warned on my way down the stairs.

There was no sign of him anywhere.

“I just made a second pot, but the espresso maker is on too.” Rose nodded toward the machines as she sat with a loaded plate.

“Thanks.” There were still two mugs sitting on the counter, one of which I assumed was supposed to be mine. I called out, “Who decided today would be a good day to quit caffeine?”

“Oh, that was supposed to be for Miles,” Sienna explained, sitting at the breakfast bar and munching a piece of bacon. “But he texted Noah saying he had to go back to the city. Something about looking at an apartment at the last minute. He said he might stay down there to catch up on some work.”

“Getting his offices set up,” Noah finished explaining.

That should’ve been a relief. I didn’t have to spend the rest of the weekend avoiding him, reliving every stupid mistake I made last night every time I looked at him. I could have the weekend I’d been looking forward to all this time without complications.

What a joke. The complication was already there in the form of memories vivid enough to make my pussy moisten even now as I plated my breakfast.

One thing was for sure. Once I returned to town, I had to talk to him as soon as I could get him alone. I sure as hell couldn’t go on like this forever.

“What do you think?”

I looked away from the window, pulling myself back from the daydream I was drowning in as Mom swept into the room wearing a dark blue gown with a full skirt and intricate beadwork across the bodice. For somebody against asking Ari for help finding something for the gala, she sure seemed to be enjoying herself now.

I loved seeing her looking so confident that she strode across her bedroom, admiring her approach in the full-length mirror. “You look incredible,” I told her. “I think that might be the one.”

She tapped her chin with one finger, turning to look at herself from all angles. “I don’t know. There are others to choose from. I don’t want to pick the first one without trying the rest.”

“Good point.” I tried to inject a little enthusiasm into my voice, but I had a feeling it wasn’t enough.

Turning away from the mirror, she focused on me. “What’s wrong? You seem off.”

Dammit. The last thing I needed was for anyone suspecting a problem and connecting it to Miles. And wasn’t that funny, considering how prior to Friday night, I would have gladly admitted I was concerned about him? Then I had to go and make out with him in a fucking Cessna, making it a bad idea for anybody to pay close attention to the way we interacted unless I felt like getting my ass chewed by my parents. They were big on the whole stepbrother angle. Technically, it wasn’t wrong, but there were still implications I didn’t feel like getting into.

“Long weekend, lots of skiing. I tired myself out.”

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