Page 54 of Fallen Roses

Ana laughs bitterly. “Is it, James? If you were in her shoes and your children were asking if you had anything to do with their father’s death, what would you do?”

“I suppose.”

I rub the soap on her shoulders, and she groans as she leans into me.

“What if it’s true, and she was responsible?”

“That’s the million dollar question.” She sighs. “I can’t answer that because it’s not something you can plan for. I’m guessing my brothers will be angry. Hell, so will I. If it’s true, she must have a very good reason though, because to my knowledge, they had a very happy marriage.”

“A woman scorned.”

I voice my thoughts and Ana nods, shifting to drag my lips down to her soft bruised ones.

I kiss her slowly, relishing every second of this. Knowing it may be some time before we get to do this again.

As she pulls away, she whispers, “If it’s true, I will hear her out because if Adele was right and it was because of Veronica, it kind of blurs the lines a little.”

She strokes my face lightly and her eyes shine as she whispers, “If I was faced with the thought of losing you to another woman, my heart would break. I couldn’t share you, James; Iwon’tshare and if that terrifies you, tell me now because I want us to be on the same page.”

“I have no interest in anyone else.” My eyes bore deep into hers, as if to drive my point home.

“You may not like the monster who sleeps in your bed, but you need to know him before you make your decision.”

“What decision?”

“On whether I’m a man who is worth your loyalty.”

Uncertainty creeps into her eyes and I hate knowing I was the fool who put it there and my voice is wrappedin regret as I whisper, “I told you I have never brought a woman here before and it was true. You are the first.”

“That’s good though, right?”

She blinks as she waits for my next words to ruin the moment, and I nod. “I am a member of a club where I go to for sex.”

“A sex club?” Her eyes widen with horror.

“Yes. It’s not the usual kind, though.”

“Tell me.”

I hold her against me, afraid she will hate me when she realizes how depraved I really am.

“The members wear masks as anonymity is guaranteed because it’s all about the moment. The act of sex, not the emotional side.”

“It sounds cold.”

“It is. Anyway, anything goes as they say and you can fulfill your darkest fantasies with a willing companion.”

She shifts slightly but it’s not away. If anything, she moves closer and horror has been replaced with curiosity.

“Like what?”

I take a deep breath. “Bondage, whips, group sex, anything really. Kind of what Adele was into, but this time I was the one in charge. I suppose I needed it to cancel out what she did to me. If I controlled what happened and the woman was willing, it made everything, well, normal I guess.”

“I guess.”

She inches closer, her eyes bright, and she flutters herlashes and says coyly, “Will you take me there when I return?”

I’m so shocked I have no answer to her question and her eyes are bright as she whispers, “Please, James. I want to understand. It’s a huge part of you that I don’t know about and if I am to judge you on your choices, I must understand them first.”

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