Page 60 of Obsession

Under the stream of water, his image materialized in my mind. Without meaning to, the simple act of washing reminded me of his touch, and my hands unconsciously traced the paths he had taken.

I could no longer recognize myself and sometimes felt like I was going crazy.

I went to my room wrapped in a towel, my wet hair falling over my back and shoulders. As punishment, I had to study, so I put on a pair of shorts and a comfortable white top, grabbed my math book, and sat on the bed, crossing my legs under me, and trying to remember how this subject worked.

I was fully focused on solving a matrix, and as I was about to reach the end result – all tangled up in columns of numbers - my phone next to me started buzzing, pulling me out of my concentration. I started to mumble and wondered who was suddenly interested in my life.

When I saw his name on the screen, I freaked out.

H: Wear something sexy tomorrow.

I stared at the text like an idiot.

I read it a few more times and then made sure he’d sent it.

My skin was burning with anger, and I was on the verge of swearing at him like a sailor. I was just thinking about how he wasn’t a total pervert, that we’d had a decent hour together and he’d even kissed my forehead, and then he had to go and send that text.

I locked the phone and threw it on the bed.

Maybe it was better this way, easier not to forget who he was and keep him away. He managed to pretend long enough while we were in the kitchen, and now he was starting to show his true colors again. I wanted so much to have him in front of me and slap him again, whether it turned him on or not.

Fucking asshole!

If I responded, I was sure a bunch of perverted messages would follow. I wasn’t in the mood for that with him after narrowly escaping his charms a few hours earlier – barely - so I decided to ignore him. Full of rage and muttering under my breath, I threw myself on the bed and dropped the math book on the floor. All my will to study was gone. Slowly, my eyelids closed, and I continued to mumble about demons and sexy outfits until I fell asleep.

***

I woke up, startled by the cries of a desperate voice calling my name over and over again.

“I’m here, Mommy,” I shouted from under the huge tree and ran into the sunlight so she could see me, careful not to squash the white butterfly in my hand.

“Oh, honey, how many times do I have to tell you not to run away from me?”

My mother hurried to me, hugged me tightly and then dropped to her knees to look me in the eye. The sun’s rays played in her black hair, and my mouth twisted into a smile when I realized mine was shining like that too.

“Let’s go to Daddy, honey,” she took my hand in hers and stood up with a sweet smile on her face.

“Careful, Mommy, you’ll squish my butterfly,” I cried and raised my hand to show her the delicate little creature.

“Oh, darling, I’m sorry. It’s very pretty,” she smiled and studied my hand.

I took her other hand and let her lead me through the park, which was full of children. The sun was shining so brightly that I could feel beads of sweat forming on my forehead.

When we reached Dad, I quickly ran into his arms to show him the butterfly I had caught.

“It’s very pretty, sweetie, and he’s dressed in white, just like you,” he smiled and gently pinched my nose.

My white lace sundress was similar to his soft wings. It flapped them slowly without flying away. It also seemed to be melting from the heat.

“Do you want to play with the other kids, Katy?” my mom asked, pointing to a group of kids my age who were playing ball.

“No, Mommy,” I replied, pushing my long black hair out of my face. “It’s too hot to be running around with a ball,” I cried with a puppy face, which made them both laugh.

I watched the excitement around while taking shelter under a tree. Kids my age were jumping for joy on the field, happy to be out of kindergarten and done learning numbers and colors for the day. I smiled with amusement because I loved learning. I wanted to be as smart as my mother when I grew up. But I loved dancing even more.

Suddenly, my attention was drawn to a girl my age who was happily playing with her mother and chasing a ball. Her blonde hair was just as long and thick as mine and her pink dress looked beautiful on her. I wanted to play with mom tooand looked for her, but I couldn’t see her anymore. I went out from under the tree, but a strong wind pushed me back and ruffled my hair.

Then I saw my mommy talking to another man. I called out to her, but she didn’t seem to hear me. I felt tears prick my eyes as my mother kissed this man. I looked around for my dad, hoping to keep him from seeing it, but then I noticed him next to the girl in the pink dress. He took her in his arms and kissed her on the cheek, just like he had done to me.