Page 191 of Obsession

“Let the pain out, baby. Release it. Scream.”

I heard his whisper and the desperation inside me listened to him in a violent way.

I threw my head back and screamed. I screamed as loud as my lungs would allow, releasing the pressure that had killed me this year and destroyed everything beautiful about me.

The pain and the consequences of my own decisions, the regrets, the work I had put in and couldn’t take back.

The disappointments and the tears.

I cried out again as the rain flowed past my lips and into my mouth, then I leaned forward and slammed my fists on the ground. The mud broke through my fingers, and my body unchained itself.

I let the wave take over me and stood up.

I danced like I probably never had before, with a fury purer than anything else as I forced my body to let out all the power that had been dormant inside me.

That sparkle Harris had spoken of.

Pain mixed with euphoria, and the tears were replaced by smiles. Harris was still sitting, the AirPod he had taken out now in his ear so he could hear the song and understand my dance better.

Each time the melody hit, my body leaped towards the darkened sky, through the liberating, raging rain, which pushed me back into the cold mud.

I managed to make the moves that had earned me trophies, those agonizing pirouettes that had sprained my ankles and broken my tendons. The impact with the grass wasn’t as hard as the impact with the floor, which is why I’d always loved dancing in the rain.

Panting and feeling alive after so long, I stood up and didn’t move as the rain washed over me and I closed my eyes.

When I opened them again, Harris was standing in front of me. He didn’t say a word, he just grabbed my hips and lifted me up.

He lifted me until my body was above his head, and I fought exhaustion to keep myself upright as I held onto his shoulders.

He continued to push me up as high as he could, and I opened my legs in the splits, as I knew he loved to do. The joy in his smile made me smile, and then I started to laugh.

I really loved him at that moment.

For all he had done for me.

I threw my head back and screamed again, this time with joy.

Harris screamed with me.

Our screams dissolved into the surrounding nature, into the rain and the thunderstorm, our imprints marked into the universe for eternity.

We each had our own pain that kept our hands and feet bound, our own fears, but we were both free of them now as we lost ourselves in happiness and release.

He turned a few times, spinning us around, then lowered me until my legs wrapped around his waist. I had no patience for him to say anything else, so I grabbed him by the back of hisneck and kissed him with all the happiness pulsing inside me like a star reborn.

Nothing had really changed, but it seemed that way.

The exhaustion, the muscle pain left behind by the effort, my heart pounding, I had missed it all so much.

I was covered in mud, but Harris embraced me and returned my kiss with the same thirst I had.

“Thank you,” I whispered as we parted, and he bent his knees until he sat back down, and I straddled him.

“How are you real? How am I the one who found you?” he whispered over my lips as the song repeated in the AirPods, but I could hear him.

I took mine out, knowing it would soon be broken from getting too wet. Harris threw them both on the grass somewhere and took my cheeks in his hands.

My breathing was still intermittent, but I smiled as my heart pounded.

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