Page 190 of Obsession

I couldn’t help but smile. I loved rain, and it had been too long since I’d been able to enjoy it properly.

“I used to dance in the rain,” I admitted, the words coming out before I could stop them.

Harris looked at me intently, then took my chin between his fingers and turned me around. I expected him to ask me what had happened, why I’d quit, why I’d ruined a career I’d worked my whole childhood and adolescence for, but all he said was:

“Dance with me now.”

I blinked in shock.

“No…”

“Please. I want to see you, to see the spark you so ferociously keep behind walls.”

He took a step back and grabbed my hand, then pulled me towards him with a pirouette. My feet tangled in the wet grass, and I smiled as I was back in his arms.

“I don’t know if I can do this, Harris.”

I swallowed down the bitterness and tried not to think about the last time I’d danced.

He leaned down and kissed my neck just below the ear.

“What’s your favorite song?”

I closed my eyes.

“At the moment… it’sMadness,” I smiled, because so far it seemed like too dramatic a song, but I just couldn’t understand it.

I didn’t know what Harris was doing behind me until he shoved his AirPods into my ears. I turned to him and saw that he had his phone out, then I quickly turned my back to him.

“What are you doing?” My voice cracked.

“I want to tear down that wall.”

I pressed my lips together, knowing he meant the wall that had kept me from following my dream. Harris wanted to heal me, but I didn’t think I was capable of doing that in front of him.

“Take a few steps forward, close your eyes, clear your mind, and let your instincts guide you. Don’t think about anything, let this beautiful body take the reins, baby.”

He touched my hips, his fingers gently stroking around my ribcage, then gently pushed me forward.

Before I could turn around and give up, the song boomed in my ears.

I winced and closed my eyes as the pain hit me in the face and memories of disappointment and abandonment came flooding back.

The pain of shattering a dream.

I allowed myself to accept that the loss of my career now hurt more than the loss of my mother. That pain subsided as hatred took its place, but the dancing… I had lost it.

My tears mixed with the rain and my head fell back, my pain mingling with the sadness in the song, with the madnessand horror in the lyrics. As I thought about Harris’ words, I cleared my mind.

But I didn’t move a muscle.

I didn’t know what to do, my body had forgotten to follow its instincts, and the pressure deepened the pain even more.

The song started again, and I stood frozen in the rain I could only feel, with Harris behind me, who I knew was watching me.

I sank to my knees.

I felt Harris next to me as he grabbed me by the waist and pulled an earphone out.

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