Page 12 of Owning His Mate

“You don’t have to answer that. Sorry.”

I push away from the wall, intending to run to my bedroom and grab my things. If I leave now, maybe I can put some distance between us.

“There is no resisting the bond, Apryle.” My footsteps falter and I close my eyes, squeezing them tightly together as my fears are confirmed. “It’s like an out-of-body experience. My brain was saying one thing, but my body was not having it.” She shifts uncomfortably. “I love Sawyer—don’t misunderstand what I’m saying. He is everything to me, but I was helpless against the bond. It can’t be fought, and it’s just a waste of energy trying.” She blows out a breath. “What I realized afterward was that most of what I was feeling was fear I’d created myself. I was scared of hurting Sawyer the same way I thought I hurt Edward.”

That makes sense to me, and it mirrors a lot of my own issues, though I’m not scared of hurting him. I’m terrified ofhimhurtingme.

“Was the bond wrong? Did you wish it had chosen someone else for you?” I wince even as the words pass my lips.What kind of question is that to ask someone?

Roux moves up behind me, slowly stepping around until she’s in front of me. “Have you bonded with someone?”

I bite my bottom lip, trying to hold together my shattering emotions. “I don’t want him.”

Sympathy ripples across her face as she grabs my hands and walks me into the living room, easing me down onto the couch.

“Who?”

“He’s a vargr wolf named Kye.”

“What’s going on? Who’s hurt?”

We both look up as Halle and Tessa rush into the room. Tessa locks her gaze on me, and I can see the moment she understands something is really wrong.

“Apryle’s mate is here,” Roux says. She speaks slowly, as if trying to make them understand that this is not a happy thing.

Tessa and Halle exchange glances before the little moon-touched female moves to the couch, sinking down next to me. She surprises me by taking my hand in hers. It’s no secret I’ve never been nice to anyone in our coven, so I don’t expect her kindness at this moment, but Tessa has always been the one with the biggest heart out of all of us. I hope she doesn’t lose that with all the horror we are facing.

“You don’t like him?”

I don’t know how to explain to her that everyone I’ve ever trusted has betrayed me. “I can’t have a mate.”

My breathing becomes labored again. I feel crazy. I’m sure they think I am.

“Apryle, I understand being scared,” Halle says in a low, soothing voice, “but the magic that creates mating bonds knows what it’s doing.”

I shake my head. “If it knew what it was doing, it would never put me with him. I can’t do this. He’s not for me. I don’t… I don’t want to be with someone.” I fist my hands over my temples as his presence swirls through my mind. There is just no escaping him. “I need to disappear. I’ve done it before. I can do it again.”

The women exchange worried glances.

“You can’t leave. It’s not safe out there,” Roux pleads.

“I’ll hide in the human world. I know how to pass as human.” I try to stand, but Tessa grabs my hand, forcing me to sit again. I’d have to hurt her to pull free, and I won’t risk her or her pup.

“No more running. That’s all we’ve done in the past, and it doesn’t work. Eventually, everything catches up with us.”

“And we don’t want you to leave, Apryle.” This comes from Halle, who is perched on the coffee table in front of me, her red hair pulled over one shoulder. “You’re one of us. We already lost Hester from our coven. We are not losing you too.”

This stuns me. “You… you want me to stay?” I say the word slowly, my brain failing to comprehend any of this.

“Of course we do,” Roux answers. “You’re our friend.”

My heart squeezes so tight at those words. I’ve always felt like an outsider, even at the Sanctuary. Part of that is my own fault. I’m not exactly the cuddliest person to get to know. Pushing people away, making them hate me, has been my defense mechanism for so long now that I don’t know how to be any different, and yet despite all that, despite my attempts to remain alone, these womenlikeme.

I just wish they hadn’t chosen to tell me this now when I have to leave. It’s going to be harder to do that after this.

“I have to go.”

“No, you don’t.” Halle stands, looming over me despite her short stature. “If you go, we’ll find you, and we’ll bring you back.”

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