There was a long second of silence between us, and I pulled back to stare at him, smile gone, a thoughtful expression on his face. There was a ball of emotion forming in my throat, but before I could say anything else, he said:

“I could make it better.”

My heart stopped for a second.

He said it so low between us, if I hadn't been basically on top of him, I might not have heard him. There was a note of uncertainty in his tone, one that I wanted to rip away.

We had been stuck to each other all night before we came in here, especially Dan, who had come closer to me, pressed himself to my side, all warm and smelling of his shampoo and his cologne, staring a little moodily at Miriam, who was still in town for a few more days, and who had grinned like a cat in his direction.

The fact that he might even feel a little possessive over me was enough to make me want to rip his clothes off right here and now, but I needed to pull the brakes between us. I needed this to not get more out of control than it already was, especially with Travis's words about Dan moving on from this—moving on fromme—soon, so close to the forefront of my mind.

It had already been several weeks since Dan had shown up in my life. It meant that we had two or three weeks tops together left. It shouldn't have bothered me as much as it did, I should have beengladthat I would be going back to my peaceful Dan-less life, and yet I couldn't feel that.

I just stared at Dan, and asked, “Will you, baby? Will you be good for me and let me take my anger out on you?”

Dan’s breathing hitched. He was quiet for a long second before saying, “I’m yours to use, aren’t I?”

Opposite emotions warred inside me.

Still, I needed to take this for what it was.

“Then what are we waiting for?”

We made it home, and as we had last week, the door hadn’t even closed behind us when we were already trying to take each other’s clothes off. I kissed him all the way to the bedroom,mybedroom this time, because I was already breaking all of my rules, what was just one more?

I pushed him to the bed again, because I’d seen how much he’d loved it last Friday, and again, I was met with the sexiest overcome gasp, Dan’s lips parted and bitten already, eyes dark with desire.

I crawled on top of him, making it so he had to be lying down to face me. “Will you be good for me now, Dan?”

His nostrils flared, his already naked chest rising and falling quickly, and as much as it seemed a little bit difficult for him, he still nodded.

Dan always started a little more tense, more guarded, like he was still trying to put some emotional distance between us, and yet as we went along, he always started softening, each time a little bit more, giving in to his desires, to my hands exploring the whole of him, and even now he shivered, still holding on to a little control, but looking up at me like he wanted so bad to give it away.

Do it.

I wanted it. I wanted all of it. I wanted to push Dan, to break him, to have him at my mercy. I wanted to let all of my anger and frustration out on him because he was thecause.

Those pretty blue eyes.

That mouth.

That jaw.

The way he looked at me.

That sharp tongue that always fought me verbally but that gave in so sweetly once against my own, and I wanted nothing more than to discover all of his weaknesses and hoard them, push them like buttons, make him melt like butter left out in the sun until he was all mine, soft as putty in my hands.

I prepped him. Just like last time, he started getting twitchy, like he was liking it too much, so I wasn’t too surprised when he groaned against my mouth. “Just do it. Fuck me.”

“Do you have something against foreplay?” I asked playfully, feelingmean.

“Yes, because you’re coddling me, and I don’t need it.” He tightened his grip on my hair, giving it a tug that went straight to my balls. “Use me.”

My gut tightened, and much as I wanted to delay this further, edge him a little bit, I couldn’t, not anymore, not when he looked at me like that, so I kissed him, bit him, left him lying on the bed with a push and kept him down with my hips on top of him, because he wasmine, and Dan seemed to get off on feeling my weight on him. Restrictions. Bodily ones at that.

I finally got the condom on and with generous lube–because I was sonothurting him, not on my watch, no matter what his impatience made him say–I started pushing into him, and his eyes widened, just like his lips. He tugged me closer to him and I drank in his overcome expression, something I hadn’t been able to do last Friday but had done several times now since then.

It never got old. Every twitch, every blush, every gasp, every little almost inaudible whine was everything to me. I wanted them, wanted to remember them, to have them forever in my memory because I knew we were on borrowed time and I hated it.