Page 81 of Obsessed with my Temptation

And they would. I knew they would. I’d never told them just how much this ‘perfect Prince’ persona grated at me. It felt so ungrateful, like such a stupid complaint, why would anyone hate that? Why would anyone feel near breaking when everyone looked at them like freaking royalty?

I also hadn’t told them the depth of what I felt for Travis.

But I had to.

I couldn’t take this anymore.

“I’m just so fucking tired of having to pretend to be perfect all the time. Of always having a ‘nice’ face on, of being the charming Prince everyone expects me to be, especially with assholes like Mark, when all I really wanted was to sucker punch him.”

“Did something happen?” Antony asked, dark eyebrows low. “Has he done something you haven’t told us about?”

The truth wanted to burst out of me and so I let it. I told them about the night at the party, where he offered to have a threesome with me and Henry. Antony’s eyes widened, jaw set hard, and Eliot was open-mouthed and outraged beside him.

Then I told them about what he did to Travis. About Mark setting him up to be expelled and ruined just because Travis was trying to do the right thing—even when it hadn’t been his business, even if it didn’t concern him, because Mark wasfucking up someone’s life,and for what?

Not to mention Travis and Mark had been together. If I thought more about it I might just go back and really punch him.

I didn’t doubt what Travis had told me. If anything, Mark’s expression and his words, Henry’s freakingreaction,had been more than telling. If I was a Prince, Henry was a King around here, and not much went on that he didn’t know about.

“It’s not your fault Mark is a douchebag, Scott, and if you’re feeling guilty for hanging out in the first place—” Eliot started saying, but I interrupted him.

“No, it’s not just that. It’s the fact that I’m a coward, guys. I’m always hiding behind this Prince mask that I hate. I don’t want to be this person, but I’m too scared of what other people might think to do anything real about it. I’m scared to disappoint people who know me, to disappoint my freaking professors who question my well-being if I don’t get an A. And it’s the fact that I can’t even properly stand up for the guy I—Fuck.”

I pressed my back against the wall of a building and slid down until my ass was on the ground, hands on my face. Eliot and Antony quickly came closer and squatted down beside me, their hands on my knees.

Antony was the first to speak. “You’re in love with Travis.”

“Yes.” There, I admitted it.

“And he broke up with you,” Eliot added.

“Yes.”

“But did you tell him? How you feel?”

“Why would I? He—He told me to try and date other people. That it was for the best and I deserved someone who wouldlove me.”

My friends winced.

“Okay,ouch.” Eliot shook his head. “Look, I can’t tell you what he thinks, but I’m pretty sure thatloveisn’t too far from it. Especially with the way he looks at you and treats you.”

“He’s right, you know? Dude’s completely smitten.”

“Then why would he leave me?”

“Well, why wouldn’t you tell him you love him?” Antony raised his eyebrows.

“Because—he was going to leave me anyway, eventually. Travis deserves to be in a relationship with someone more shameless, who doesn’t care so much about what other people think about them. Someone who doesn’t hide behind a persona.”

I was just like Mark, wasn’t I?

“Everyonecares, Scott, as much as you think they don’t,” Eliot said, and his tone made me look at him. “You guys saw me as someone who didn’t give a shit, you know? And I gave almost too many shits to cope. But if you hate it, you can work on it. And now that you’ve told us, we can help you.”

I took in a ragged breath, on the verge of crying.Jesus. These past few days had been rough.

“I feel like a coward. Like this should be easy and I should have stopped being this way a long time ago, and I still can’t do it.”

“You can if you want to and you will. But you’re not a coward. You’re just scared.” Antony stared into my eyes with so much feeling and understanding, like Eliot did, that I felt much of the weight come off. I felt like I could start breathing properly for the first time in days.

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