Page 26 of Bonding the Band

“I guess she wouldn’t be in any of the pictures from that night,” Phin said with a sigh. “I still don’t understand why she would’ve gotten a VIP ticket and not used it to see us.”

Half-formed memories poked my brain like a pin. “I don’t think she likes us.”

“What the fuck do you mean she doesn’t like us? She bought a VIP ticket.”

I rubbed my forehead with my fingertips, trying to encourage the memory to surface. Something something friend…Jane Austen…that didn’t make any fucking sense. Um, book? Did we talk about books? Why would I talk about books at our concert? I let out a frustrated growl.

“Hey,” Phin said softly, laying his hand on my shoulder. “We’re going to find her. We’ll convince her to hang around for a while, and you’ll get better. We’ve got a lot of resources, so between the four of us, it’s only a matter of time.”

It had already been months since Seattle. I knew how long it took babies to grow, I knew we had time, but it seemed like every second that passed was a sand grain racing out of the hourglass. If I was feeling like shit, then she had to be feeling worse. I didn’t know what the fuck was going to happen, but doing anything other than finding her immediately and fixing however much I could right this moment would be the ultimate dick move.

“Am I a terrible person?” I asked quietly, already convinced of the answer.

It took Phin a half second too long to say no and something inside me shriveled. I was such a fuckup. I tried so damn hard and just kept screwing everything up. Now I’d involved someone else…and a fuckingbaby. What the hell was wrong with me?

“I don’t know what to do.”

“One step at a time, Henny. First we find her, and then we figure out what to do next. No sense freaking yourself out before that happens.”

I rolled my eyes. “You’ve known me since high school. I think we both know that not freaking out is not one of my specialties.”

“Truth.” Phin offered me a smile. “Listen, there are way worse people on this planet. On the scale of shitty humans, I don’t think you’re anywhere near irredeemable. You don’t actively try to hurt anyone, right?”

“Right.” I swallowed hard.

“Then you’re miles above the worst of humanity. Your priorities are just a little fucked up.”

“How do I fix that?”

Phin shrugged. “I don’t think I’m in any position to give you advice about that. Besides, you’re getting ahead of yourself again. Right now, we’re only worried about finding the omega and making sure neither of you keels over from your little fuck-and-run.”

“And if she’s pregnant like the doctor thinks?”

Phin looked at me for a long moment. “I assumed you wouldn’t be interested in that part.”

I wasn’t. Was I? A kid was an even bigger wrench in my plans than a mate.

“The look on your face is giving panic vibes. Once again, we have tofind herfirst. Do I need to get you some edibles to chill out?”

It probably wasn’t a bad idea. I was going to stress myself into a whole fucking collapse at this rate. I nodded, not trusting myself to speak.

Phin pulled one package from the fridge, where he stashed them so they wouldn’t melt, and passed me a rock-hard gummy. I gnawed it into submission and stretched out to wait for the magic effects.

“It’s all going to be okay, Hen,” Phin assured me.

It sure didn’t feel like it.

Chapter 11

Phineas

“What are you looking at?”

Hendrix was hunched over his laptop like Gollum clutching the One Ring. He slapped it shut, whipping his head up and staring at me with wide eyes.

“You’re not watching porn on the bus, are you? That’s aprivateactivity, dude.”

His shoulders sagged. “Not porn.”