Page 26 of Forever Mr Black

He reappears in the doorway, a frown etched across his face. “Jamie was going to rape you. Did you expect me to let him get away with it?”

I shake my head in frustration. He doesn’t get it.

“What you did was too much. If Big Steve hadn’t dragged you off him …” I trail off. I know exactly what would have happened.

“I was protecting you.”

“Protecting me doesn’t mean killing someone,” I snap.

“Did you think I was just going to give him a slap on the wrist?”

“It’s not the way. Kicking the shit out of Theo isn’t the way either.”

“Then, we’d better agree to disagree.”

“No, I won’t. I don’t like what I saw tonight. I’ve seen you angry, I’ve seen you punch someone, but I’ve never seen you like that. You totally lost it. You scared me.”

He drops his eyes to the floor in regret. “I’m sorry I scared you. I didn’t want that. I’ll never hurt you, Sophie. I’ll never lay a finger on you … “

He’s missing the point.

“I know you won’t. I’m not scared ofyou.I’m scared of the damage you’re capable of doing to someone when you’re in that mindset. You were so focussed on hurting him.”

He angrily shakes his head. I know I’m in a losing battle.

“I hurt him because of what he’d done to you and what he was going to do to you. I don’t regret it. I’m not going to apologise for protecting you, and I’m never going to stop.”

If that’s him protecting me, I don’t want to know. “I didn’t like the man I saw tonight. I can’t …” I pause as the events of the night crystallise. “I can’t be with someone who would do that.”

“Then, we’ve got a problem because that’s me. And I’m not going to change.”

He doesn’t understand where I’m coming from, and I doubt he ever will. He can’t see that this reckless, violent streak of his is unacceptable. I can’t be with a man like that. And I can’t be around him right now. No amount of talking will make him understand. He’s right; we’ve got a problem—a very big problem. I’m drawing my line in the sand.

I slip off my engagement ring and put it on the bedside table.

He stands perfectly still, glaring at the ring for a few seconds. For a moment, I think he’s going to say something, but he doesn’t. He turns and stalks into the en suite, slamming the door behind him.

The odour of cigarettes and lager assaults me. I snap open my eyes to be greeted by darkness. Pain slices through me down below, and an ice-cold hand grabs the back of my neck and rams my face into the pillow.

Not again.

He’s on top of me, trappingme beneath him as he carries on with drunken, haphazard thrusts. I twist my face to the side and suck in a lungful of air, telling myself not to panic. But it’s no use. I open my mouth and cry out into the darkness as fear rises in my chest. I close my eyes and try to conjure my happy place, but it won’t come. His thrusts are getting harder and angrier, and the sting between my legs tells me I’m bleeding again.

I’m trapped. With nowhere to go. And I scream Art’s name.

Warm skin replaces cold hands. I smell a freshly showered scent instead of the repugnant stench of cigarettes and alcohol. I’m not pinned down anymore. I’m sitting up in the spare bed with a pair of strong arms wrapped around me and soft lips pressed against my forehead.

Reality dawns in the darkness of the bedroom. Another nightmare.

I relax against Art and close my eyes as my frantic breathing starts to slow. He waits for a few moments until I calm, shifts the covers off me, slides an arm beneath my knees, and wraps his other around my back, lifting me to his chest.

I rest my head against the curve of his neck as he carries me through the apartment, and I don’t argue when he lays me down in bed and tucks me in. He climbs into bed behind me. I feel his warm body against mine, and he curls an arm around my waist. I close my eyes, safe in the knowledge that he’s here.

Nine

As the first light of dawn peeks through the windows, I become acutely aware of the lack of warm skin against mine and the cold, empty bed beside me. I roll over onto my back as the events of the previous evening come flooding back to me. Theo. Jamie. Art. Our fight.

I glance at the bedside table. The engagement ring is gone. I took it off in anger in an attempt to make Art see I was serious. But what if we can’t come back from this? An unsettling thought hits me. Maybe he’s already come to that conclusion. And he’s taken back the ring.

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