Page 25 of My First and Only Crush

“It’s no big deal,” I say hastily as he stretches out beside me, longer and bigger, his body so different to mine that I want to touch and explore and discover, but I can’t because he catches my hands in his.

A muscle in his jaw flexes. “It’s a big deal to me.”

When I lean in, he lets me worm my way right up against him, which feels like a good sign. His skin is warm and irresistible, so I press my face into his neck.

My heart is beating a mile a minute, and maybe he can feel it, because he settles his hands on my bare back and rubs the top one right where I’m panicking.

“And maybe it should be a big deal, hmm?” His lips move against my hair.

I nod, a lump forming in my throat.

“I never wanted it with anyone else, either,” he says so quietly I almost miss it over the pounding of my heart.

I gasp, and he growls before crushing his mouth to mine. This kiss feels different. It feels rough and honest and binding.

When he stops, his mouth is wet and his eyes are blazing. “It might hurt.”

“Good,” I say stubbornly. “Then I’ll always remember it.”

“I want you to remember it for the pleasure.” Between us, his cock pulses. Another good sign. “But if I’m going to be your first, you need to know that I will also be your only.”

CHAPTER11

TRICK

“You don’t mean that,” she mumbles into my neck.

“Of course I mean it,” I growl. “Maybe I shouldn’t. No, IknowI shouldn’t, because I’m an asshole to put any conditions on your first time being whatever you want it to be. But you also deserve full honesty from me about what it will mean.”

Which is everything.

She lets out a watery laugh. “Until the morning. I know where I stand in the pecking order with baseball.” She says it so calmly. If I weren’t holding her naked in my arms, I might have missed the way she has to steel herself to get the words out.

“Not with me.” I kiss her hair, then her temple, then her cheek. Working my way closer to her mouth, until she reluctantly lifts her face and I sear her lips with mine. Hard. Claiming.

A promise.

She kisses me back, a little hiccup in the whimper that slips out between hungry licks.

I need to obliterate her fear and doubt here. I am not her father. I’m not going to put her second fiddle.

But haven’t you, all season long?

I thought I was doing the right thing.

Until tonight, I resisted my attraction to Sinclaire because once upon a time, she was something different to me. Years ago, she was Jeff’s kid, and I gave her all the time and attention she wanted. And I wouldn’t make a different choice, even if it meant never having her naked in my arms, because that little girl had needed me. But over the last eight months I’ve had a bittersweet regret that we couldn’t meet for the first time, now. That I couldn’t simply be a man for this young woman to get to know and trust as a lover.

And I probably used baseball as the excuse for not doing something about that.

I cup her face in my hands. “You are all I ever want. And I will be what you need.”

“Tonight, I need you to want me,” she whispers back.

My cock thumps against her belly, eager to serve.

Can I lock down the rest of my feelings for her? I should be able to. I have lots of practice.

We’ve both been keeping secrets. She’s kept her innocence to herself. My secret feels much less noble—a dark possessiveness, and everything we’ve already done tonight has amplified that base need for her to dangerous levels.

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